Walk On
by Boyfrom0z
Summary: Sequel to With or Without You - Tamaki and Kyouya are together, but have to hide this from the world because they know they won't be accepted. guy/guy. If you're a Tamaki/Haruhi shipper this is not for you, so stop being mad at me - you've been warned
1. Prologue

Kyouya had always been a good liar. He had spent his whole life carefully concealing his emotions and not letting anyone see how he truly felt. He had even come to enjoy it in a strange sort of way. He got a certain sense of power when he let people think something that wasn't true. He liked being able to distort the views of others. It had never really bothered him at all.

Until now.

Now he hated it.

He hated living a double life. He hated covering up who he was. He hated hiding the most important thing in his life.

However, if he wanted to keep that thing, keep it safe, he had to.

He had to protect Tamaki.

--

**This is a sequel to _With or Without You. _It will sort of make sence if you haven't read the first part, but some things won't. Basicly, *spoliers* Kyouya tired to kill himself because he thought he couldn't be with Tamaki, but they end up togther. I'm writing a part II for it**** because I liked it and other people seemed to like it and I, for one, want to know how Tamaki and Kyouya are going to deal with this. (I don't know yet.) ****I'm probably going to be slow getting it written because of school and everything, but I hope you'll like it, esp. if you were a fan of part I (thanks so much to those of you who are!). **


	2. Revolution

"Tamaki, we are not having "French Revolution Day," alright?" said Kyouya for what felt like the ten-thousandth time.

"Why?" Tamaki asked again.

"Do you know _anything_ about the French Revolution?" demanded the exasperated brunet. "It was bloody and horrible. It is not appropriate."

"But I _like_ France!"

"There are other things in France besides the French Revolution!"

"Like what?" asked Tamaki sulkily.

"How should I know? You're the one who grew up in France!" If Kyouya ever met someone more annoying and stubborn than Tamaki, the shock would probably kill him. Yet, Tamaki was _his_ annoying, stubborn idiot and he loved him.

"What's up?" asked Haruhi as she entered the Host Club.

"Tamaki's set on having a "French Revolution Day" because he likes France," Kyouya explained.

"So are we getting a guillotine or something?"

"We're not having it."

"Kyouya!"

"Tamaki, for the love of god, drop it!" Kyouya shouted, cracking at last.

"Kyouya," Tamaki half-whispered, half-whimpered.

Kyouya sighed.

"We can do something French, just not that, Okay?" he suggested, trying to placate his lover.

"Okay!" cried Tamaki, bouncing back at once.

Haruhi sighed and went to drop her school bag in the side room. She threw Tamaki an annoyed and rather scathing look as she passed him.

"What's up with her?" asked Tamaki in confusion.

"Well, you _did_ suddenly dump her with no explanation," pointed out Kyouya.

"Yeah, but that was ages ago!" Tamaki insisted.

"You called her and said "I can't be with you. I'm sorry" and then hung up and didn't even try to contact her for the rest of the summer," Kyouya explained, trying to be cool about it and more or less failing. "It wasn't very tactful."

"Yeah, but isn't she over it by now?"

"Apparently not," said Kyouya a bit darkly.

"Can't I just _tell_ her why I had to break up with her?" asked Tamaki, who did not understand why Kyouya had not let him explaining anything to Haurhi when he had, against Kyouya's probably much better judgment, insisted on breaking up with her.

"No!" said Kyouya sharply. "I told you, it's dangerous enough to randomly break up with her, but you- we- _cannot_ tell _anyone_. Why is this such a hard concept for you?"

"But people are bound to find out," persisted Tamaki.

"Don't I know it," Kyouya sighed.

"What-?" Tamaki began, but he was interrupted by the arrival of the rest of the Host Club.

"Hey," chorused the twins.

"Tama-chan! Kyou-chan!" cried Hunny.*

Mori gave his usual, silent greeting.*

"It's been a while, hasn't it?" Hikaru commented.

"Yeah," agreed Tamaki.

"Alright, alright, we can do all are "how are you"s _afterwards_," said Kyouya loudly. "Our customers will be here any minute. Kaoru, you've got something on your shirt. Hikaru, pull back all the curtain and crack a few of the windows. Hunny, whatever you were just eating is all over your face. Mori, could you please clean him up? Tamaki, stop bouncing around and get the tea and coffee going. And could somebody find Haruhi?" It was nice to be back in control.

--

* As in the manga/anime, I'm ignoring the fact that they should have graduated.


	3. Unanswered

Apparently, Kyouya had been a bit too expeditious in giving his orders because no one was left to find Haruhi. He sighed when he realized this. He needed to get a few things in order, but they would have to wait until the seventh host was located.

"Haruhi?" Kyouya called, sticking his head into the side room of the Host Club.

"What?" came the reply. Haurhi's voice sounded thick and seriously pissed-off. She seemed to be behind the curtains they used for changing into the outrageous cosplays Tamaki sometimes made them wear.

"Our customers are going to be here soon," he informed her, keeping himself in his "strictly business" mode. "Are you presentable?"

There was a pause in which Haruhi presumably looked in the mirror.

"Not really," she muttered.

"Well, if you'd do whatever you need to do." He turned do go.

"Kyouya!" she called suddenly.

"Yes," he said, suppressing the feeling that he did not want to hear what she was going to say.

"Is he Okay?" she asked in a very out of character rush. "I mean, did you see him this summer?"

_Shit,_ thought Kyouya._ I thought I had more time to figure out how to deal with this – with her._

"This is basically an entirely male club," he stalled even though he knew exactly whom she was talking about. "You're going to have to be more specific."

"You know who I mean," she said.

"Yes, I saw him. He's going through some, shall we say rocky? times," he said as tactfully as he could. "Now, if you wouldn't mind getting ready." He turned to go.

"This isn't like him," she said in voice that was somewhere between pensive and sulky. "He's never secretive."

"And this isn't like you," Kyouya countered. "You're never anything but blunt and incisive."

"I'm worried about him, Okay?" Haruhi said sharply as she threw back the curtain that had been hiding her.

It was lucky Kyouya had spent the majority of his life concealing his emotions.

Haruhi looked a real mess. Her eyes were red and she was squinting, as she seemed to have taken her contacts out. Her boy's uniform was rumpled as if she's been hunched over on the floor for a while and the misery in her eyes was mixed with anger as she fixed Kyouya with her nearly-blind gaze.

"I can say that you took ill if you like," he said coolly as if her appearance were nothing out of the ordinary.

"No, I'll do it," she muttered, the furry draining from her eyes.

"Alright." He walked slowly to the door, leaving her to clean up. He was about to go when he came to the tough decision that Haruhi dissevered a more of a real answer. "I think, I hope, that he _will_ be Okay in the end. I know things are hard for him now and it's probably best if he- That is, it could take him a bit of time to, uh, _adjust_ and maybe come to terms with some things, but I'm sure he'll explain everything when he's ready. Just give him time. I'm not saying everything will go back to how it was, but someday he'll be able to answer your questions. It's just he can't answer everything himself yet."


	4. Things to Loose

"She's worried about you."

"Why?" asked the blond.

"She thinks you're acting strange. And she's right in a way. It's not like you to not broadcast your every thought to the whole world." He smirked at Tamaki.

"So should I –we - tell her or something?" he asked.

"No," said Kyouya bluntly. "Not yet."

Tamaki sighed. He crossed the Third Music Room and began closing the slightly open windows.

"She _is_ right. I'm not meant to live like this," he said when he'd finished.

"What do you mean?" Kyouya asked sharply, looking up from his laptop.

"I'm not good at keeping secrets and stuff. I'm not like you. I can't hide how I feel. I don't know how much longer I can keep this up," said Tamaki, a note of desperation in his voice.

"Tamaki, we can't have it both ways, alright? I'm putting you in enough danger as it is." Kyouya rose and walked aimlessly towards the side room, away from Tamaki.

"_You're_ putting _me_ in danger?" asked the blond incredulously. "_My_ father hasn't thrown _me_ out of the family lately. I'd say you're in a lot more danger than-"

"That was _my_ fault. Anyway, you have so much more to loose. The soul family heir, you could loose everything!" He wheeled round to face Tamaki.

"If you leave me to try to protect me," he said quietly, "I _will_ loose everything."

"Tamaki," Kyouya sighed. _God, how does he do this to me? He could talk me out of or into anything. And he always sees right through me. How?_ He slowly crossed the room to where the blond stood by the now closed windows.

"You know the last thing I want to do is hurt you, but..." Tamaki's voice faded away.

"But what?" asked Kyouya, stopping a few feet away from him.

"I don't understand!" he burst out at last. "If you love me so much that you almost-," he stopped himself. "Why do you keeping talking like you want to break it off or something? You're right; we _can't_ have it both ways. You can either have me and be happy or leave me and be miserable, but if "protecting" me will make you happy..." He stared at Kyouya with confused, puppy-dog eyes.

"I don't want to break it off," said Kyouya, trying to keep his frustration out of his voice. "I just don't want anything to happen to you."

"Haven't I told you? I'm not like you! I wasn't raised like you. I haven't spent my whole life being told that getting to the top is the only thing that matters! To me, the only that that matters is you and being with you, Okay?" Tamaki hadn't meant to sound so angry, but he _had_ grown up in such a different world from Kyouya that sometimes he did not understand his lover's outlook on life. He sighed. "Can't you understand that I don't care if I loose my status as long as I have you?"

"I'm trying," replied Kyouya quietly. "I'm trying."

The slightly taller boy took a few steps, closing the distance between them.

Kyouya raised a hand to Tamaki's face, gently running the backs of his fingers down the other boy's jaw, across his chin, and settling his hand, palm down, on the blond's left cheek. Tamaki blushed slightly and smiled, ever so slightly pressing his face into Kyouya's hand.

"_Je t'aime_," Tamaki whispered, slipping into French as he tended to do when his deepest emotions took over.

"_Je sais_," Kyouya replied as he applied just enough pressure to Tamaki's cheek so that he other boy inclined his head towards Kyouya's waiting lips.

The two boys were still cautious in their kissing; their touches often seeming more curious than anything else. Tamaki's lips gently met Kyouya's and they held together for a few moments before Tamaki pulled slightly away and rested his forehead against Kyouya's. The dark-haired boy gazed into his lover's lilac eyes over the tops of his lenses and they smiled at each other and kissed again.

--

**The French means (should mean – assuming I got it right) "I love you" and "I know." If anyone reading this is new to the story (i.e. didn't read _With or Without You_****), it's been established that Kyouya's learning French for Tamaki.**


	5. An Epiphany

Haruhi's rather androgynous face was creased with worry and annoyance as she washed the dishes her father had left in the sink after dinner.

She was annoyed with herself more than anything else. Why had she gone to pieces like that? It was stupid. It shouldn't bother her.

It didn't bother her.

At least, what was bothering her wasn't what Kyouya seemed to think was bothering her.

It didn't really bother her that Tamaki had broken up with her. As much as he'd flirted with her before, he had never seemed totally _there_ during their short-lived relationship, never totally dedicated. In fact, she was glad in a way; he wasn't her type at all. No, what bothered her were the suddenness and the lack of an explanation. Add Kyouya's useless words to Tamaki's strange behavior and it had to be a recipe for deception.

Tamaki was hiding something from her – from the Host Club.

That was what was bothering her.

"What is _up_ with him?" she muttered to herself as she rinsed a bowl. "This isn't like him at all."

_Something's wrong. Something's wrong and Kyouya knows what it is and he's not going to tell me!_

She sighed.

What could it be?

_And now Kyouya's acting strange. Saying all that weird stuff. That wasn't like him, either. It was almost like he was trying to be _comforting _or something. _

Haruhi wiped the steam from the hot water off her glasses with her sleeve. One great thing about being home was not having to wear those stupid contacts; they got so painful after awhile. And today she's gotten something behind them. God, had that hurt!

Haruhi hit herself hard on the forehead with a soapy hand.

"Well, that's _one_ mystery solved."

_Kyouya was acting like that because he thought I'd been crying over Tamaki!_ She laughed at herself and at the older boy. _I mean, I was worried about him, but I was crying because I had something in my eye. Stupid contacts!_

Haruhi finished up the dishes and then sat down with her schoolbooks. However, she was uncharacteristically unfocused.

_What is _up_ with those two? First, Kyouya goes nuts last year and almost dies and now Tamaki's being all secretive. What could it be?_

She tried to think through it logically.

_What could have set Kyouya off last year? There's no way the two of them acting weird isn't related._

She thought back to the events leading up to Kyouya's near-death experience.

Kyouya had vanished after that dance the Host Club had held.

_What had happened that night that could have upset him? I don't remember a lot of that night; I was so wrapped up in Tamaki._ She rolled her eyes at herself, wondering what she could have been thinking. _Let's see, he looked sort of sick. Everybody walked in on Tamaki and me kissing..._

"No way," Haruhi whispered as an idea hit her like lightening. "Oh my god." She mentally skimmed the events that had taken place between Kyouya seeing them kiss and that afternoon. It explained everything. "Oh my god."


	6. A Confrontation

"Kyouya, your phone's ringing," called Fuyumi.

"Coming," he shouted back, wondering where he'd left the stupid thing. He hurried out of his room and down the hall to where his sister stood holding his phone.

"I found it in the sofa," she said as she handed it to him.

"Thanks," he said, taking it. "Hello?"

"Kyouya?"

"Haruhi?" What did _she_ want?

"Listen, Kyouya, I've got to ask you something," she said sounding very intense.

"What?" he asked cautiously.

"Don't get angry, Okay? I'm just speculating, but I think I just figured something out."

"Are you Okay?" Kyouya asked. Haruhi sounded breathless.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"So, what's up?" asked Kyouya, dreading the answer.

"Are you alone?"

"Uh, hang on." He walked quickly back to his room and shut the door. "I'm in my room."

"Alone?" she pressed.

Kyouya glanced over at his bed where a shirtless Tamaki lay staring vaguely at the ceiling. "Not exactly."

"Who's with you?"

"Tamaki."

"Oh, Okay." She sounded as if Tamaki didn't count.

"Alright, tell me what's up already," he demanded.

"Who is it?" mouthed Tamaki, sitting up and taking a slight interest.

"Haurhi," he whispered back, covering the phone as he spoke.

"What does she want?"

Kyouya shrugged.

"Please don't bite my head off for saying this, Kyouya, but it makes sense," she said a bit nervously.

_Shit. She knows. She knows!_

Kyouya's eyes were wide and he cursed himself for making Haruhi work for the Host Club. _Why does she have to be so damn perceptive?_

"Yes?" he said, trying to keep his voice steady. _Maybe it'll be Okay,_ he told himself. _Just because she knows doesn't mean..._

"I think I know what's up with you two," she said slowly. She was a bit anxious about coming straight out and saying it to Kyouya even though she knew she was right.

"What's up with us?" repeated Kyouya, stalling even though it was against his nature. "Us meaning...?"

"You and Tamaki," she said.

"Me and Tamaki?" Kyouya asked, trying to sound as if she could not have paired two more random people.

"Yes."

"Well?" prompted Kyouya after a minute.

Haruhi took a deep breath. "You're together, aren't you?"

Even though he had known it was coming, Kyouya still felt a serious jolt in his stomach upon hearing Haruhi speak the words aloud.

"What is it?" asked Tamaki, standing up and moving towards his suddenly pallid boyfriend. "Kyouya? Are you Okay?"

Kyouya swallowed. "She knows," he mouthed.

Tamaki's eyes widened.

"Well?" Haruhi asked. "Are you?"

Kyouya closed his eyes for a moment before opening them and speaking, his grey eyes locked on Tamaki's lilac ones. "Yes."

"That explains everything," she said, sounding almost smug.

"I'm sorry," he said, ignoring her words. "Do you want to talk to him?"

"Why are you sorry?" she asked, genuinely confused.

"You seemed really upset earlier."

"I _was_ worried about him," she explained, "but the real problem was that I had something in my eye." She gave a small laugh. "I'm happy for you guys."

"Really?" asked Kyouya, surprised and not entirely convinced.

"Of course. Well, I can't say I'm thrilled with Tamaki for not talking to me all summer, but now that I know what's going on, it all makes sense. I can see why you guys wouldn't want to talk about it. No offence, but your father's kind of psycho."

"None taken," said Kyouya vaguely, his head still reeling.

"Well, I'm glad I got that straightened out. I gotta run, lot's to do," she said cheerfully.

"It's Friday," Kyouya pointed out.

"So? I've still got homework. See you Monday!"

She hung up.

Kyouya closed his phone and slowly put it in his pocket.

"What did she say?" asked Tamaki.

Kyouya swiveled his gaze onto the blond and shook his head.

"I will _never_ understand that girl."

---

**I felt kinda bad for Haruhi, so I hope any of her fans are a little happier with me now that she wasn't crying over Tamaki. These past two chapters are for kyoya16 who continued reading this after expressing a rather strong dislike for Tamaki/Kyouya. Thanks for the inspiration for these chapters! You probably didn't like them, but that's Okay; they makes me happy.**

**OH and P.S. I forgot to mention this earlier. Just like **_**With or Without You**_**, this is named after a U2 song that I think fits the idea for the story. Look it up on youtube or something; it's a great song.**


	7. Right Kind of Wrong?

Hours later, Tamaki lay, propped up on his elbow, watching a thin ray of light that slid through the blinds play across his lover's pale face.

_You're so beautiful when you sleep. Well, you're beautiful all the time_, he amended, _but that doesn't sound as good._

There was one part of the young man lying beside him that would not be seen as beautiful to the average observer, but, although it brought about horrible memoirs, the uneven scar on Kyouya's side was beautiful to Tamaki. He traced the thin, white lines delicately with his fingers. The wound, combined with total exhaustion and the loss of his will to live, had almost been Kyouya's death sentence, but thankfully Tamaki had found his friend in time. Now he lay beside the dark-haired youth running his fingers over the pale marks that had once bathed them both in blood.

"You really shouldn't be here you know," said Kyouya without looking round at Tamaki.

"Oh! I thought you were asleep."

"When I could be listening to your breathing? I thought you knew me better."

Tamaki blushed in the darkness.

"It's almost three in the morning," said Kyouya sitting up and putting his glasses back on. "You never even called home. Won't your father be worried?"

Tamaki shrugged. "Maybe. At least it's Friday"

Kyouya sighed. "Idiot."

"Hey!"

"You are and don't even think about trying to deny it. It's the middle of the night. No one knows you're still here. You're alone with me in my room – in my bed to be more specific and I very much doubt if you know what you did with your shirt," he pointed out.

"What _I_ did with my shirt? As I recall, _I_ was not the one who took it off." He made a face at Kyouya who rolled his eyes. It was true.

"Alright I'll give you that one, but tell me, where's _my_ shirt?"

Tamaki did not have an answer to this as he had flung the garment in question across the room hours ago.

Kyouya smirked.

"You do know what this would look like if someone walked in here, don't you?" he asked.

Tamaki thought for a moment. "Isn't it?"

Kyouya sighed. "I don't know about you, but _I_ still have my pants on,"

"Kyouya!" scolded Tamaki, hitting the other boy over the head with a pillow. "You and your dirty mind! I meant it'd look like we're together, which we are."

"It would look like a bit more than that," murmured Kyouya in a velvet and seductive voice.

Tamaki decided the best course of action was to ignore this comment and move on.

"My father might be a little mad when I get home, but I'm sure he won't mind. He seems to like you alright."

"He wouldn't if he knew," said Kyouya darkly, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and gazing pensively out of the black window.

Tamaki watched him with a worried expression.

"How would anyone even find out?" he asked, sounding slightly unsure.

"Same way anyone finds out about anything. Nothing stays a total secret forever and once one person knows the whole world knows." How much "secret" information had he found on the students at Ouran alone?

"Only Haruhi knows and it's not like she's going to tell anyone." He crawled over to where Kyouya sat and knelt behind him. He wrapped his arms around the dark-haired boy's neck.

"The others will notice eventually." By "the others" he meant, of course, the remaining members of the Host Club. "And how can you be so sure about Haruhi?" he added darkly.

"She'd never tell anyone!" Tamaki was very found of his "daughter."

"Anyone would say anything to anyone – for the right price."

"She'd never! You're so pessimistic, you know that? If she wanted to blackmail us or sell or info on us or something, she could have done it ages ago."

"But never anything like this," said Kyouya with a sigh. He stood up and Tamaki's arms fell away. He crossed slowly to the window. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"Me?" cried Tamaki in a hushed voice. He jumped off the bed and moved quickly to his lover. "You're the one-," his voice fell away at the memory. "Didn't we _just_ go over this?" he asked, annoyed. "Trying to ignore this isn't going to do anyone any good, Okay?"

"Idiot," muttered Kyouya again as he pushed gently passed Tamaki. "Go back to bed."

"I love you," insisted Tamaki in a forceful whisper.

Kyouya sighed. He was not used to love factoring into a person's life. It was just an inconvenience, just as being with someone was simply another means to an end, another way to gain something. Love did not equate dating or marriage in his mind. Tamaki was right, it was the way he'd grown up and it was a hard habit to break.

"I do," Tamaki pressed.

"I know," he said to the wall he was staring at across the bed.

"You do want this, don't you?" the blond asked in a hurt voice.

"Of course," said Kyouya with no dedication in his voice.

"You don't sound sure."

"I do, of course I do. You know I do. It's just…" He didn't know how to say it or even if he wanted to. "It's too good to be true and I'm putting you in so much danger."

"Now who's the idiot?" asked Tamaki. "Lemme give you a new flash. Good things happen and even last." He smiled. "And guess what else? I don't care how much "danger" you think you're putting me in! I'm sticking with this, with you."

Kyouya sighed. "You always know exactly what to say, don't you?"

"Hey, I'm a host; it comes with the territory."

Kyouya sat down on the bed and patted the twisted blankets beside him for Tamaki. The blond slowly sat next to Kyouya. He curled up next to the stoic boy, leaning his head on his chest. Kyouya wrapped an arm around Tamaki's shoulders, holding him close.

"Kyouya?" asked Tamaki after a moment.

"Yeah?"

"This can't be wrong, can it?" he asked quietly.

"What?"

"I mean, sometimes- some people think that- stuff like this- that it isn't- right," he said haltingly. "That two guys shouldn't... It's not true! They're just being stupid… right?"

Kyouya had seldom heard Tamaki sound so unsure. He was usually brimming with confidence, even when he was dead wrong – _especially_ when he was dead wrong.

Kyouya sighed again. Everything he'd ever _learned_ about society, how to fit in, how to succeed, everything he'd been taught mattered, told him that, yes, it _was_ wrong – that he was ruining both of their lives by not sending Tamaki home that instant and breaking all ties with the boy, However, everything he _felt_ told him nothing in the world could be more right.

"Just because society says something's wrong, doesn't mean it is," he said at last.

"But is it?" pressed the blond.

"Does it feel wrong?"

"No," he murmured, pressing his body closer to Kyouya's.

"Then it doesn't matter."

"But people do bad things all the time without knowing it, don't they?" pressed Tamaki, not convinced that something feeling right made it right.

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Like kids who grow up on the street and become thieves or something."

"Product of their environment," said Kyouya promptly.

"Drug addicts?"

"They know it's not right; they know it's hurting them."

"But you think this is hurting me," Tamaki said slowly.

_Damn._ Tamaki had hit the nail of the head. _Tamaki: my drug. _ Kyouya tried to reason with himself. _Sure, love's an addiction, but all love is that way, right? So it's Okay. It's supposed to be this way. I'm supposed to be with him. I don't want to hurt him; we both want this. It's right. The only way it might not be isn't that we're both guys, is that it isn't really appropriate for two people of our standing to be doing something so, well, scandalous. But just because _they_ think it's scandalous doesn't mean it is. Even if one of us were a girl, it would still be a big deal, wouldn't it? We're just going to have to take it as it comes because this _is_ right. It is._

"Kyouya?"

Tamaki's voice drew Kyouya's thoughts back into the room.

"Yes?"

"Well?" he prompted, his lilac eyes filled with battling emotions. Fear seemed to be winning.

Kyouya took a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh. The lilac eyes watched him, awaiting his verdict.

"It isn't wrong." There was not a trace of doubt in Kyouya's calm voice; it was filled with the firm and fervent convection of love.

"Then why-?" began Tamaki, his voice filled with the doubt Kyouya's mind had been emptied of.

"Like you said, people are stupid." He smiled at the blond.

"But why-?" Tamaki started again.

"Does it matter?" Kyouya asked in a voice that was too close to laughing to be sharp.

"But what if I don't want to be different?" he asked, surprising Kyouya with his words.

"It's not a choice," the burnet replied, his tone darkening as he thought of how people were often accused of choosing to be gay.

_Gay._ Kyouya hadn't actually thought of it in those terms. He knew he loved Tamaki, another boy, but he had never equated it with being gay. He was starting to see more of why Tamaki was freaking out all of a sudden.

"Then why?" begged Tamaki.

"Why does anyone fall in love?" Kyouya asked gently, running his fingers through the blond hair. "It's just the way life is, the way it's meant to be."

"You really think so?" the blond asked, his usual optimism retuning to his lilac eyes.

"Would I lie to you?"

"Never," said Tamaki happily, not even thinking about the fact that their whole friendship had, in a way, been a lie. He nuzzled Kyouya's chest with his face.

"You gunna be Okay?"

"As long as you stay with me," said Tamaki, peering up into Kyouya's face.

"Of course," Kyouya replied, inclining his head to kiss Tamaki.

"You promise?" he pressed, dodging the kiss.

"I promise I'll stay with you as long as you'll have me," said Kyouya and he meant it.

"Then it looks like you're stuck with me for quite a while, _mon __amour_," Tamaki said with a little giggle.

Kyouya smiled and leaned down just enough to kiss the other boy, who tilted his head to accept the kiss.

Their lips gently touched, Tamaki straining his neck to get closer to Kyouya. Kyouya smiled into the kiss, feeling the stress in Tamaki's body. In one, swift, easy movement, he rolled both of them over onto the bed so that a very surprised Tamaki found himself flat on his back with Kyouya hovering over his body.

"Kyouya!"

"What?" he smirked. "This isn't what you want?"

"I- You just- surprised me," Tamaki stammered.

"I love you," said Kyouya appeasingly.

"You'd better," the blond sulked.

"I do."

"They're going to try to tear us apart, you know," said Tamaki, turning his face away from Kyouya.

The burnet closed his eyes in pain for a moment.

"I know." And he did. He knew it was only a matter of time until someone less trustworthy than Haruhi found out about the love he shared with Tamaki. He knew that when that moment came, their worlds would shatter and he and Tamaki would be, at the very least, separated forever. However, "they" could never take away what he had with Tamaki. They couldn't even understand these feelings; they were too cold. They couldn't stop love, but they could do some bad damn things. He tried not to think about those things. For now all he could was try to keep Tamaki safe, try to keep them away. What else could he do?

"Hey, it'll be Okay," said Tamaki, reaching up and touching the worry lines creasing his lover's forehead. "They can take me half-way round the world, but they can never stop me from loving you. They'd have to give me a lobotomy and even that probably wouldn't do it." He smiled at Kyouya, moving his hand down to the boy's pale cheek. "As long as we have each other, what else matters?"

"And what about when we _don't_ have each other?" asked Kyouya darkly, sitting up, but remaining on Tamaki's lap.

"You'll always _have_ me," said Tamaki, also sitting partway up and speaking in a somewhat seductive voice, "even when I'm not next to you, you have me. I'm yours. Anywhere and always."

"You could drive a boy mad talking like that," he said, wrapping his arms around the blond.

"It's true."

"It'd better be," said Kyouya with a bitter-sweet smile.

_Note: I'm sorry I haven't updated it such a long time, but I'm hoping this will make up fir it 'cause at least it's long. Someone asked for somemore straight up (ok, bad word choice since they're both guys) T/K so I hope that met some of your needs. It's angsty, but they're teenagers with many, many problems. Anyway, hope you liked it!_


	8. Escape or Capture?

_AN: So once again it's been forever since I updated and I'm really sorry, but the next chapter should be up soon. ... I hope._

_

* * *

_

"Tamaki, wake up!" whispered Kyouya franticly.

"Kyouya-kun," called Fuyumi softly from the hall. "Are you up?"

"No," moaned Kyouya, faking drowsiness. "Tamaki! Come up, wake up!" he hissed at the blond as he disentangled himself from the other boy's limbs.

"Huh?" mumbled Tamaki.

"Shh!" Kyouya wrapped a hand over Tamaki's mouth. "You've gotta get up. You've gotta hide."

"Kyouya-kun?"

"Go away. I'll get up when I want to; it's Saturday." He threw a pillow at the door to try to deter his sister for a little while longer.

"Okay. Well, come down for breakfast when you're ready." Her footsteps faded away down the hall.

Kyouya removed his hand from Tamaki's mouth.

"What's going on?"

"We've got to figure out a way to get you out of here without my family seeing you," Kyouya explained.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Isn't there a back way or something?"

"Yeah, but that's where the servants are."

"Okay, well then, we'll need a diversion -a big mess that will get them all in another part of the house."

Kyouya was impressed by his lover's early morning thinking. It was one the few skills the brunet had not mastered.

"Okay, yeah. So you stay here. I'll, I don't know, knock something over or something and then run back up here and get you out." He ran his fingers through his hair distractedly. "I can take you part of the way now and stick you in that closet that never gets used...."

"Okay. Let's go then," said Tamaki, getting up and heading for the door.

"Not until you get all your clothes back on," Kyouya replied, handing Tamaki his shirt, which he had found earlier, and retrieving his shoes from by the door.

"Right." Tamaki hurriedly tugged on his clothes and grabbed his bag.

"Ready?"

"Yup."

The two boys edged to the door and Kyouya peered out. Nothing.

"Okay, just follow me."

Tamaki nodded, making a soldierly face.

The couple slipped out the door and down the hall to an inconspicuous door that hid a thin staircase that the servants used. They hurried down the staircase for a flight and Tamaki tried to keep going, but Kyouya grabbed his arm and pulled him back out of the stairwell.

"This way," he hissed.

Kyouya led Tamaki down the hall, still holing onto the other boy's arm, until they reached another discreet door. Kyouya pulled the door open to reveal a tidy linen closet. He shoved Tamaki inside.

"Wait here," he told the blond. "I'll be back as soon an I can and then I'll get you out of here."

He closed the door without waiting for Tamaki to reply.

Kyouya quickly returned to his bedroom and then proceeded to make his way over to the kitchen and breakfast room, which were on the far side of the house from Tamaki's hiding place. Servants were bustling around making breakfast and wishing Kyouya a good morning when they saw him.

He wandered causally over to the stove and leaned again it. He reached into a drawer and subtly pulled out a box of matches. He turned on the gas burner and waited for it to build up for a moment. Then he struck the match and stepped nimbly away, tossing the match at the burner.

It exploded.

The servants all burst into a panic and it was quite easy for Kyouya to slide out of the kitchen.

As soon as he was out of site, he burst into a run. He sprinted back along the path he'd come, dodging into empty rooms when he heard someone coming.

Once, he rounded a corner and crashed right into several servants.

"Oh!"

"The kitchen!" cried Kyouya, pointing.

"Yes!"

They ran on.

By the time Kyouya had reached the linen closet, the fire alarm had gone off.

_Crap!_

He flung open the door.

"Tamaki!"

"What's going on?"

"It's fine. I blew up a burner on the stove. Let's go!" He grabbed Tamaki's hand and dragged him back to the staircase. The two boys raced down towards the door to the back garden. Safety was in sight. All they had to do was get through that door and get Tamaki over the fence. From there he could easily get a cab or call his driver and get safely home.

However, there was one problem.

And it was standing, stunned, in the doorway.

"Kyouya-kun? Tamaki-kun?" asked Fuyumi. "There's a fire," she said lamely.

"There's not," he replied.

"Oh."

There was a painful pause.

Kyouya realized he was still holding Tamaki's hand and dropped it hastily.

"I thought you'd gone, Tamaki-kun."

"Uh, I was about to," offered Tamaki.

"You should get out of the house; the fire department is coming."

They _were_ shouting of the fire alarm.

"Right."

The two boys moved numbly down the stairs to the door. They passed Kyouya's sister and went out into the back yard. She followed them out and closed the door.

"Father's in the front. You should go to him. We didn't know if you were Okay, so I came back here to look for you." There was very little emotion in her voice.

_She's in shock,_ thought Kyouya.

"I'll take you around the side, Tamaki-kun," she said calmly.

"Uh, okay," agreed Tamaki.

"Tell father I'm coming," she said to Kyouya. "I think going this way would be best, Tamaki-kun."

Tamaki looked at Kyouya.

"Go. I'll see you on Monday," the burnet urged.

"I'm sorry," he muttered.

"Don't be," returned Kyouya, just as quietly.

"I won't say anything," Fuyumi said softly, looking away.

Kyouya and Tamaki nodded solemnly.

"Go, Tamaki, get out of here."

Tamaki hesitated, unwilling to leave Kyouya to his family.

"Go!" cried Kyouya urgently.

"Kyouya-," Tamaki began.

"Go! Get him out of here, Fuyumi."

"Come on, Tamaki-kun."

Tamaki threw Kyouya one last, long look before following his lover's sister away to safety.

Kyouya watched him go for a moment before turning and running to the front yard where the older men of his family were waiting for him.

"Where's you sister?" barked his father.

"She's coming," Kyouya panted.

There were no more questions asked.


	9. For Love or

_Told you I'd get it updated soon!_

_

* * *

_

That night, after it had been made clear that the house had not burned down and was not going to, Kyouya heard a knock on his bedroom door.

"Yes?"

"Kyouya-kun?" It was Fuyumi.

"What is it?" he asked even though he was fairly sure he knew.

"May I come in?"

"Yeah."

Fuyumi gently opened the door and came into Kyouya's room, shutting the door softly behind her.

The burnet was lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. His sister watched him for a long moment before tentatively breaking the silence.

"Kyouya-kun?"

"Yeah?" he said without looking at her.

"Well, um, I was just wondering if, um, that is, uh-?"

Kyouya could not stand to hear is sister stumble over the words any longer. If she could not even say it there was no way she would accept it – accept him.

"Yes," he abruptly told the ceiling.

"Kyouya-kun?"

"You can't even say it, can you?" he asked scathingly, hiding his pain at the rejection of his sister, the only member of his family who showed anything signs of affection towards him, behind his usual, cold wall. "Not saying it won't stop it from being real, you know. That's not that way life works."

"Is it real?" she asked, praying inwardly that this was just a phase, just a momentary thing, or that it had just seemed like a good idea the night before.

"I wouldn't know," he said stonily.

Fuyumi sighed in quiet relief.

"It's not like I've experienced any other love to compare it to." It was a brutal remark and Kyouya knew it.

Fuyumi lowered her eyes from her brother to the floor.

"Kyouya," she whispered, her voice full of pain.

"What?" Kyouya demanded as loudly as he dared, sitting up and glaring as his sister. "It's not like _you're_ the one I'm screwing over. This could only hurt _me_. It's none of your business."

"You're wrong!" Fuyumi hissed back.

"What do you mean?" he asked dismissively.

"Surely it's crossed your mind that if this gets out, you're not the only one in this family who's going to suffer. We'll _all_ look bad and you know it!" Kyouya had never seen her display such an interest in family (AKA business) affairs before.

"Well then, don't tell anyone," he said as if he were speaking to an exceptionally stupid person.

"If you insist on being this way, then maybe you should be more subtle about it," she shot back.

"I don't "insist on being this way!" This is just the way I am. Is that so wrong? Is it suddenly so evil to want to be with the person you love?" He glared at her, fire in the grey eyes, his breathing quick and uneven with passionate furry.

"It isn't love, Kyouya," she said quietly. "Lust and love are not the same thing. You'll understand-."

"Lust? You think this is _lust_? What do you know about it?"

"I know what I've seen and I know that two boys cannot truly love each other the way you seem to think. I know he's your best friend, but that doesn't mean-."

"Get out," Kyouya whispered in a voice that was cold as frozen iron and as deadly as a pit of vipers.

"Kyouya-kun."

"Get out."

"Please, just listen," she begged.

"Get out!" Kyouya shouted, jumping to his feet as if he were going to attack the one affectionate family member he had.

For a moment Fuyumi just stood their, tears building in her eyes as she stared at her little brother. Then the spell broke and she turned and ran from the room, slamming the door behind her. He could hear her sobs receding with her footfalls.

Kyouya stood, shaking, for what seemed like forever before he collapsed onto his bed, were he lay trembling. Had he been anyone else, he would have been crying.

His phone buzzed quietly on his bedside table, making his jump. He scrambled to pick it up, took a deep breath to steady his voice, and answered.

"Hello?" he said calmly.

"Kyouya? It's me."

"Tamaki, what is it?" he asked. His voice sounded a little tired, but otherwise hiding the abuse he'd suffered.

"I just thought I'd let you know I'd gotten home and everything," he said.

"What did you father say?" asked Kyouya, trying to care.

"He was sorta mad, but he didn't really mind. He likes you best out of your family." Tamaki smiled.

"Yeah."

There was a pause.

"Are you Okay?" asked Tamaki slowly.

"Fine."

"You don't sound fine," pressed the blond.

"Drop it, Tamaki. I'm fine, Okay?" snapped Kyouya.

"Okay," he replied in a small voice, knowing better than to press his lover for information. "Do you want to talk? You sound tired, maybe you should just get some sleep."

"Listen, don't call me for a while, Okay?" he said as gently as he could, which wasn't very. "The less Fuyumi thinks of this, the better."

"Oh, right," said Tamaki, who had been momentarily hurt by Kyouya's request.

"I'll see you Monday, Okay?" Kyouya said, prompting the end of the conversation.

"Did she say something to you?" asked Tamaki hesitantly.

"Never mind."

"But Kyouya-!"

"I told you, drop it."

Tamaki sighed. "Until Monday, then," he said, sounding very disheartened.

"_Je t'aime_," murmured Kyouya with an odd note of determination in his voice.

Tamaki smiled. "_Je sais_," he replied.

* * *

_I think __Fuyumi got rather OOC, but she doesn't have much of personality to begin with so whatever..._


	10. Comfort

It was a long weekend.

Even though the waiting only started on Saturday evening, the last hours of that day and those of Sunday were impossibly long for Kyouya.

He spent most of them in his room trying and failing to occupy himself with schoolwork and number crunching for the Host Club; it wasn't enough. He only left his room for meals, where he ate quickly and quietly. No one thought anything of it. The youngest Otori often spent whole weekends shut away in his room, working diligently. No one noted his absence from the rest of the house – no one expect Fuyumi. She, of course, said nothing.

Monday could not come quickly enough.

Sunday night, Kyouya lay awake in his bed waiting to fall asleep. He didn't know what do it. Should he just ignore his sister and keep going? Should he tell he to butt out of his life? Or...

Should he follow her very sensible advice and never see Tamaki again?

He couldn't do it. He knew that was the one thing he could not do.

He was ready to give up anything, everything - expect Tamaki.

For some reason, he could not live without the blond and he knew it. If something, some_one_, had to be lost, it would be Fuyumi. It would be his family.

* * *

Kyouya got to school early on Monday and waiting impatiently outside his and Tamaki's first period class room. Finally, the blond arrived.

"Tamaki!" he cried, unable to control himself.

"Kyouya! Hey, are you Okay?" Tamaki hurried to his lover's side, his eyes flicking left and right down the disserted corridor before taking Kyouya's hand.

Kyouya sighed. "I don't know," he said at last. "I don't know."

"What happened?" asked Tamaki anxiously.

"It's Fuyumi. She got, well, she got pretty pissed, to be honest."

"About us?"

"What else?" Kyouya's grey eyes seemed darker than usual.

"What did she say?" he asked, not really sure he wanted to know the answer, but ever willing to share Kyouya's pain.

"That is wasn't really, that it couldn't be," the brunet replied. "She said it was just- just lust." He had to force the last word out.

"She doesn't know what she's talking about," said Tamaki gently. "How could she?"

"It doesn't matter, does it? If she tells my father..." His voice trailed off leaving Tamaki to imagine the horrors that would befall his lover should his father find out they were together.

"She won't tell him. Even if she did, he learned the hard way that he doesn't want to loose you, but she won't tell him. Why would she?"

"Why wouldn't she?" Kyouya asked darkly.

"You've always been her favorite."

"Yeah and I'm sure she'd say she was protecting me or something."

The boys heard approaching footsteps, dropped hands, and quickly took a step away from each other. As the rest of the class began to assemble around them, they chatted idly about trivial things.

The day dragged by.

Their time in the Third Music Room dragged by.

They moved and spoke and smiled and acted as if nothing were wrong, but everything was wrong. Both boys saw Haruhi watching them oddly during spare moments at the Host Club, but she said nothing. She could clearly tell something was wrong, but she, for once, kept her blunt comments to herself.

After the others had gone, she made a move towards Tamaki as if to ask him something, but, at a look from Kyouya, she stopped.

"Leave it," he whispered as he walked past her.

She opened her mouth as if to speak, but closed it again as Kyouya walked away.

"She's worried about you," said Kyouya as he closed the door after Haruhi had left.

"You too."

"True, but perhaps she sees you as a be more, eh, _fragile_."

"_Me_? _You're_ the one who-!" Tamaki stopped himself quickly.

"It's alright," said Kyouya gently, moving towards his lover. "I know what I did. We both know."

Tamaki's eyes flitted across the floor and his eyes remained clouded with worry and fear.

"It's over. It can't get us now." Kyouya reached out and took one of Tamaki's hands.

Kyouya watched Tamaki for a moment. The blond bit his lip, his eyes still looking anywhere but at Kyouya.

"What is it?"

Tamaki resisted speaking for a few more moments before breaking. He looked into Kyouya's grey eyes, his own lilac ones filled with tears and fear and anguish. A sob escaped his trembling lips and he looked as if her were about to shatter.

"I'm so scared, Kyouya! What's going to happen to us?"

"Tamaki," Kyouya sighed, pulling the blond to his chest. "It's alright."

Kyouya clenched his eyes shut, flinching at his own words, his own lie. _What _is_ going to happen to us? He's right to be scared. This can't end well._

"I don't know what's going to happen, but I can tell you one thing: I will never let anyone hurt you. If anyone even _tries_ I will personally kick their ass into next year, Okay?" His fingers found the blond's chin and he tilted the tear-streaked face to look into his own. "Anyone who does anything to you is going to regret it. I don't care who they might be, they are going to wish they never came anywhere _near_ you, got it?"

"Got it," chocked Tamaki, trying to smile.

Kyouya stroked the soft, golden hair.

"What about your family?"

"What about them? If it comes down to it, which it won't, I'm staying with you."

"But-"

"But nothing. I will _always_ stand by you, _always_."

* * *

Ah! I _finally_ updated! I'm soooo sorry it's been soooo long, but I've been soooo busy. Anyway, I've got an idea of where this is going in the next couple of chapters so get excited. I know that stuff *looks up at chapter* was basically filler, but they needed to be cute.


	11. Sick

Days passed and then a week and Kyouya thought they just might be safe.

Then, nearly two weeks after Fuyumi had confronted her little brother about his relationship with his best "friend," Tamaki did not come to school.

_It's nothing,_ Kyouya thought. _He's probably just sick or something._ He tried to shrug the issue off even though he had spoken to Tamaki on the phone the night before and he had been fine.

"Are we still having the Host Club?" asked Haruhi when she spotted him in the hall between classes.

Kyouya thought for a moment.

"I suppose so," he replied. "Tamaki wouldn't want us to not have it just because he's sick. Though of course we won't do as well without him..."

"So we're having it, then?" she pressed.

"Yes," said Kyouya, making the executive decision after a moment of thought.

"Okay, I'll tell the twins." She turned and hurried away towards her next class.

Kyouya watched her go, wondering what was _really_ up with Tamaki.

* * *

During lunch, Kyouya slipped outside to call Tamaki to check on him.

The phone rang and rang, but just when Kyouya was about to give up someone answered it.

"Hello?" whispered Tamaki, sounding frightened and furtive.

"Tamaki, what's wrong?" he asked at once.

He heard a man's voice in the background and Tamaki called, "Just a friend." The man said something indistinct and Tamaki replied, "Just checking on me, I suppose. Giving me the homework, you know."

"Tamaki?" Kyouya repeated. "What's going on?"

"I'm ... sick," said Tamaki, sadly.

"What sort of sick? How bad is it?" asked Kyouya, concerned for his lover.

"Bad." There was a pause. "Hang on." There was another pause. "Sorry, I had to get into my room where no one can hear me."

"If you're sick, why weren't you in your room before? Shouldn't you be resting?" Something was up; Kyouya could sense it.

"Oh K-!" cried Tamaki, cutting off Kyouya's name in a strangled sort of whisper. "It's not that kind of sick!"

"What do you mean?" asked Kyouya quickly, fear in his voice too.

"I can't say, they're probably still listening. If they realize..."

"That you're talking to me," Kyouya finished hollowly.

"Yes."

"My sister told your father." Everything was falling horribly into place.

"Yes."

"You're not coming back to Ouran, are you?"

"Either that or he'll expel you. But even my father's not brave enough to piss of yours like that."

"Are they sending you back to France, then?" he asked in a dead voice. Nothing seemed real. This could not be happening. It was worse than everything he'd feared. In his fears _he'd_ been the one being found out, the one being sent away, the one loosing everything – _him_ not Tamaki. He was supposed to protect Tamaki, to take the fall for him, to suffer for him, to do _anything_ for him, to die for him.

"I don't know." Tamaki's voice sounded like it was about to break.

"Is he going to speak to my father?"

"I don't know, but I doubt it. Maybe he'll leave it up to your sister, but he probably just doesn't want to make your father his enemy. He thinks it's _my _fault, that I roped you into it or something."

"That's not true! Why didn't you tell him that's not true?" cried Kyouya, showing emotion for the first time since he had heard the terrible news.

"I'm not going to let this happen to you too," Tamaki whispered fiercely.

"But Tamaki-!"

"No, this isn't going to happen to both of us!"

"I'm not going to let them take you away from me. I'll stop them; we'll run away. We have to do something!"

"I've got to go," said Tamaki abruptly.

"Tamaki-," Kyouya began, a wave of desperation slamming into him.

"Put the Host Club on hold until I talk to you again," he said in a rush. "I'll explain more later. Wait for me to contact you."

Kyouya started to say "I love you," but Tamaki had already hung up. He stood stunned for a moment before heading off to robotically deal with the Host Club being closed.


	12. Blame

Even though he had made all the proper arrangements for closing the Host Club that day, Kyouya still found himself in the third Music room after school.

_What's wrong with you, Kyouya?_ he demanded of himself. _ Aren't you supposed to be the one who has everything planned out, who knows what to do in any situation? Snap out of it and _do _something!_

"Damn it," he muttered to himself.

_How could I have let this happen? Why didn't I see it coming and _do_ something? Not that there's a lot I could have done, but still I could have talked to __Fuyumi or something, anything. I'm the only one who could have protected him and I failed. I failed him. His life is ruined and it's all my fault. If I hadn't been so stupid last year, he wouldn't have found out how I feel about him and maybe he wouldn't have realized how he feels about me and none of this would have happened! The one thing that mattered, the one thing! and I lost it. I let it be destroyed._

Kyouya started passing the room, his steps growing ever faster.

_And god only knows what's going to happen to Tamaki. God, what are they going to do to him? He said he was "sick," but that was just a cover up his father fed him or something, right?_

Kyouya froze.

"Oh god," he breathed. "Oh no, oh please dear god no. His father _does_ think he's sick, but not that kind of sick. Oh Tamaki, what have I done? What's he going to do to you?"

* * *

_I'm sooooo sorry it's been soooo long! But it's summer now and I have the next two chapters writen and they are a lot longer than this one._


	13. Ready To Run

_This isn't my best and I may not have done a great job proof reading it either._

_Note: The things on the list that have "X"s on either end are crossed out._

* * *

That evening Tamaki sat alone in his room contemplating his options.

_What would Kyouya do?_ he asked himself. _Be logical. I've got to be logical._

He dug around in his school bag and found a pencil and a scrap of paper.

"Options" he wrote across the top and then paused as he tried to think of what to put on his list.

1) Go with whatever happens.

_No, I can't do that._ He sighed and crossed it out. _I've got to do something. I can't just do nothing._ It took him a good fifteen minutes of thinking and writing and crossing out and rewriting to come up with the finished product.

Options

X 1) Go with whatever happensX

1) Run away with Kyouya

2) Just run away

X 3) Forget KyouyaX

3) Kill my XselfX father

4) Pretend it was just a phase/joke and go back to how it was (still with him in secret?)

X 5) Never leave this room again X

He reread the list, trying to figure out what to do. The more he stared at the page, the fewer options he seemed to have.

"There's really only one thing I can do, isn't there?" he sighed to himself.

He slowly crossed off options 2, 3, 4, and 5, and circled option 1: Run away with Kyouya.

He reached for his laptop and opened it. He was about to log into his IM account when he stopped. He didn't want anyone to figure out they'd been talking. He quickly made a new screen name using the first thing that came to mind and an old email address he'd never used much and then logged in, not as blondprince01, but as ready2run and sent a message to shadowkingxx, the screen name Tamaki had made for Kyouya.

Ready2run: We've got to make a plan

Shadowkingxx: Who is this?

Ready2run: It's me.

Tamaki's figures tumbled over each other in an effort to get to the keys as fast as possible.

Shadowkingxx: Me being...?

Ready2run: Oh stop being so skeptical!

Shadowkingxx: Tamaki

Ready2run: Of course!

Shadowkingxx: So you've got a plan?

Ready2run: Get out of here. It's the only option I can see.

Shadowkingxx: Ditto – I'm assuming there's no way I can talk you into just forget this?

Ready2run: No way!

Shadowkingxx: ok

Ready2run: ok, so where to?

Shadowkingxx: Got any other family?

Ready2run: France

Shadowkingxx: Other than France

Ready2run: Not really, u?

Shadowkingxx: Not really

Ready2run: Well we could just start out on our own...

Shadowkingxx: At our age? With whose money?

Ready2run: point taken

Shadowkingxx: got any other ideas?

Ready2run: I made a list...

Shadowkingxx: please share

Ready2run: the whole thing? I crossed some stuff off...

Shadowkingxx: whole thing

Ready2run: ok h/o

Ready2run: Go with whatever happens, Run away with you, Just run away, Forget you, Kill myself/father, Pretend it was just a phase/joke and go back to how it was (still with you in secret?), Never leave this room again

Shadowkingxx: I'd advice against killing yourself

Ready2run: I crossed that one off

Shadowkingxx: good

Shadowkingxx: forgetting me isn't half bad, as long as you can convince your father

Ready2run: NO!

Tamaki heard footsteps drawing near to the door.

Ready2run: g2g

Ready2run: Keep the host club shut – he blames it

Shadowingkingxx: but what's the plan?

Kyouya's screen informed him that Ready2run was no longer online.

Tamaki had shut his laptop and pushed it away himself just fast enough to be lying on his back, staring at the ceiling when his father opened the door to his room.

"Tamaki?" he began, sounding exceedingly uncomfortable.

"Yeah?" asked Tamaki in a dull voice that was far from his usually tone.

"Can I come in?"

Tamaki though about saying "Can I stop you?" but instead he sat up and, with as much gratuitousness as he could muster, said, "Of course."

His father entered his bedroom and sat on the wooden desk chair, watching his son settle himself on the edge of the bed.

"What can I do for you, father?"

Tamaki's forced good manors did not seem to set his father at ease.

"Tamaki," he began again. "I'm worried about you, I really am."

Tamaki tried to keep the "yeah right" look off his face.

"I know you don't believe me, but I'm doing this because it's what's best for you," he said as gently as possible for a man who thinks his son has gone completely off the deep end and is quiet close to as good as dead.

"How do you know what's best for me?" Tamaki inquired, somehow managing to keep his tone conversational.

"You're future, Tamaki. You can't risk that because of some adolescent hormone problem or-,"

"Oh, but when you're older it's perfectly fine to just ditch your life and run off to be with the person you love!" Tamaki shouted, jumping to his feet as he finally snapped.

"Tamaki!"

"You say you loved my mother and that's why you just up and left everything to be with her. Is that not true?" Tamaki really was losing it, now. He was pale and breathless and he had had enough.

"I make a mistake, Tamaki, a mistake," his father said, trying to calm to boy down.

"So now my mother is a mistake? _I'm_ a mistake?"

"Of course not," said the old man tiredly.

"Then why did you say it?" Tamaki shouted.

His father sighed. "You're a teenager. It's my responsibility to do what's best for you. If you can get help now..."

"I don't need help! There's nothing wrong with me!"

"If you could only see yourself."

"If _I_ could only see myself? Me? You're the one who needs to take a look at what's going on, at what you're doing!"

"I've had just about enough of this, Tamaki," said his father, starting the fume.

"Do it then," he said, his voice suddenly dead calm.

"What?"

"Do it. Send me away. Send me somewhere to get "helped," to get "cured"."

"Tamaki," he warned.

"Do it."

"You know you leave me no choice."

"Do it! Do it if you have no choice. Do it if you're too afraid to keep me as your son. Do it if you're too blind to see love. Do it!" He was sobbing now, screaming and sobbing. He was beyond hysterical he stood there, breathless, watching his father slowly take his phone and his computer, the two ways he might have contacted Kyouya, and move slowly towards the door.

"I'll send someone up to help you pack your things."

Tamaki stood in his room, staring at the closed door. He could barely breathe from tears. He felt his knees buckle and hit the floor. He let his body fall forward, his forearms and head meeting with the carpet, which was soon wet with his tears.


	14. Emotion

_Sorry! I know last time I said I'd update soon, but then stuff came up and my computer's been acting up lately. So I'm sorry it took me awhile, but here it is._

_

* * *

  
_

Kyouya never heard anything from the superintendent of his school nor did his father say a thing to him about what had happened. Clearly, he did not know. His sister wasn't speaking to him; in fact, she avoided him at all costs. None of the rest of the family seemed to take any notice of this.

At school, however, the affects of what had happened were anything but unnoticed. The girls were complaining about the Host Club being closed and, within a few days, the entire school knew Tamaki was gone. Rumors were circulated furtively for fear that the superintendent would hear, but none of them came anywhere near the truth. The closest one hypothesized that Tamaki had gotten a girl pregnant and had been forced to marry her. Hikaru's favorite stated that Tamaki had been arrested for international drug dealing, though a close second suggested he'd run away to America and that they would all see him in the next big Hollywood blockbuster.

Kyouya was in the library, trying and failing to focus on the paper he was supposed to be writing when someone tapped him on the shoulder. He looked up and saw, to his surprise, that it was Mori.

"Kyouya," he said in his quiet, dark voice. "Third Music Room. After school. Today."

Kyouya started at him, but Mori simply turned and walked away. He knew very well what this was about. He had been avoiding the rest of the Host Club fairly effectively since Tamaki had vanished, but he knew they wanted the truth and knew he had it.

So after his final class, Kyouya walked with heavy feet and heart up to the Third Music Room.

Five sets of eyes started at him as he entered the room and closed the door. He felt trapped. What could be possibly say to them?

Hikaru broke the horrible silence.

"Where's Tamaki?" he asked bluntly.

"He's gone," said Kyouya dully.

"No kidding, but where is he?"

"He's gone, alright?" spat Kyouya, on the very edge of totally blowing up. "He's gone and won't be coming back to Ouran."

"But why?" asked Kaoru.

"Does it matter?"

"Yes," said Haruhi.

"Then you tell them," he snapped at her.

"What?" she asked.

"You know why he's gone, don't you? You tell them if it's so damn important." He turned away from the confused and hurt faces of the only people he might call his friends.

"Kyouya?" said Kaoru tentatively.

"You want them to know?" asked Haruhi slowly.

"Does it matter?" he said again, still facing the doors.

"It's your life."

"No," said Kyouya shaking his head and smiling ever so slightly through a film of tears. "It's not mine." He barely hid the break in his voice.

"What do you mean?" asked Hikaru.

"Kyou-chan, what's going on?" asked Hunny.

Mori made a questioning sort of sound.

Kyouya bit his lip for a moment then turned back to face them, whipping all emotion from his face as he did so.

"Do you want to tell them, Haruhi?" he asked calmly.

"It's up to you."

Kyouya thought for a moment.

_What would Tamaki want? What would he do? Tell them, I suppose. That idiot could never keep his mouth shut, could he?_

"What did you mean, "it's not mine"?" pressed Hikaru.

"I meant my life," said Kyouya still with that mask of cool calm.

"Then whose it is?" asked Kaoru.

"Whose do you think?" His voice was even, despite the thousand different emotions that had Kyouya entangled in a never-ending web of fury, love, resignation, bitterness, defeat, defiance, and most of all unbearable pain.

He could tell by the looks on their faces and in their eyes that one by one the remaining four were beginning to understand.

"But Haruhi, I thought you and Tamaki..." said Hikaru uncertainly.

"We both saw pretty quickly that that wasn't right," she said gently.

"So what's going to happen to him?" asked Kaoru.

"I don't really know, but I have pretty good guess," said Kyouya, his voice so close to shaking that he was forced to speak slowly. "I think that his father's going to send him away somewhere – to one of those places where you, supposedly, get - better."

The twins took an unconscious step closer together as if in defense.

"But what about us? What about to Host Club?" asked Hunny.

"Apparently, his father blames it in some capacity," explained Kyouya, seizing gratefully on the facts. "I've no idea why. We didn't meet here and surely being around so many young ladies..." His voice trailed off.

"Kyouya," began Kaoru, "how did his father find out about you two?"

"My sister told him. She saw us together."

"Doing what?" asked Hikaru with a slightly wicked note in his voice.

"Hold hands," replied Kyouya coolly.

"This is all ridiculous," said Haruhi suddenly.

Everyone turned to look at her.

"Excuse me?" Kyouya said.

"It is! We all know there's nothing wrong with Tamaki, at least nothing that some psycho psychiatrist could fix. And it's not like his father doesn't know what it's like to love someone who maybe isn't great for your reputation, no offence, Kyouya. I mean, he ran off to France, for god sake. There's nothing wrong with him – with either of you; it's them that's wrong." She waved her hand to indicate the wider world. "They're the ones who don't know a good thing when they see it. Anyone who can condemn love is wrong, is sick, is crazy! We've got to stop this, we've just go to."

The boys stared at her.

"Wow, Haruhi, tell us how you really feel," said Hikaru.

"Not that I don't appreciate the sentiment, but there's nothing we can do. Anything we try will not only be useless, but will most likely get us expelled. We have to wait it out," said the dark-haired boy in his coolly logical tone.

"How can you say that, Kyouya? How can you let them win?" asked Haruhi, who was still somewhat hysterical.

"Haruhi, he didn't want this to happen to both of us. I tried to stop him, but-." He sighed. "The least I can do now is keep going. That last thing he's going to want to hear is that I've vanished from Ouran too."

Haruhi just stared at him, slowly shaking her head.

"You think it's not killing me?" he asked, his voice finally starting to shake. "You think I can stand to walk into our classrooms and see his empty desk, to walk down the hall knowing I won't run into him, to think how I'll never hear his ringtone at 3 o'clock in the morning again, to know I'll never be pulled away from my homework on a Saturday afternoon by those laughing eyes? You think I can take this? If I didn't think that if something happened to me, he'd hear about it, I think I would end up dead this time. They say that people who've really tried to kill themselves and failed hardly ever try again, but I learned that can do it and this time he wouldn't be there to pull me back. I won't though - for him."

The others stood in silent shock for a long moment. Kyouya hardly ever smiled or frowned if it wouldn't benefit him and the idea that he had just bared the most important part of his soul to them was beyond stunning. The idea might have been funny in a past that suddenly seemed to them all to be years and year ago rather than a few days. However, the pure pain in his words, the raw truth that he had shown them was horrible to watch. The agony Kyouya was in now seemed to radiate from him, flooding his friends and causing them to wonder if they had ever been in that much pain, even when they had thought their friend was going to die.

"Kyouya-," began Haruhi, moving towards him, reaching out a hand to him.

"Don't, Haruhi, just don't." He turned and strode away through the doors and out of site.

A long and agonizing silence followed his departure as they all wondered if they would even see either of the two boys again.

"So Tamaki and Kyouya, huh?" said Hikaru in an effort to break the painful silence.

"How long had they been together?" asked Kaoru.

"Since what happened last spring, I think," said Haruhi hollowly.

"We've got to _do_ something!" cried Hunny.

Mori nodded.

"Like what?" asked Haruhi. "A daring rescue of Tamaki from wherever they've got him? Kyouya's right. There's nothing we can do. Maybe it'll just be till we graduate..."

"Or maybe they'll lock him up for good! He's our friend; we can't let him go like this! I thought you were all for not letting them win!" Hikaru shot back angrily.

"It's his father that sent him away," pointed out Haruhi. "But maybe once he'd legally an adult, if they can't prove he's insane, they'll have to let him go," she mused.

"This is Tamaki's father we're talking about," said Mori darkly, "his word is proof."

No one had an argument to that.


	15. A Plan

The twins had always operated alone. Even after broadening their world to include the Host Club, there was still a distance between them and everyone else. They had never really taken orders from anyone, not their parents, nurses, or Tamaki and they were not about to start now.

"So I'd say the best plan is to hack into his father's account on the school computer network, figure out where he is and go from there," said Hikaru, recapping what they'd worked out so far.

"But there's no way we'll get in without Kyouya," argued Kaoru.

"There're other smart people in this school. It'll be easy to get one of them."

"Easy, but not safe."

"True."

The twins fell silent for a moment.

"We'll just have to get him to help, then. If he's already desperate enough to kill himself then surely he'll risk expulsion."

"But Hikaru, they'll know it was him. Who else would do that? He doesn't want Tamaki to hear about anything bad."

"And why would his father remind him of Kyouya? Surely he wants him to forget it."

"Still," said Kaoru. "Anyway, even if we _did_ find out where is he, then what? Daring rescue? Hide him in our room? It won't work."

"I thought you wanted to save him, Kaoru."

"I do! But, Haruhi's right, the best we can hope for is him getting free for college or something."

"I'm not giving up on him!" said Hikaru hotly. "Would he ever give up on one of us?"

"Yeah, but he does stupid stuff like that."

"So? We can do this. Come on, Kaoru, when have we ever let impossibility stand in our way?"

Kaoru stared at his twin for a long moment and then he smiled and nodded.

Hikaru opened their laptop and began to work.

"It's better if we go in from one of the school computers, but we can do some preliminary stuff here," he said as he typed.

"What should we go for? His email?"

"Probably a good place to start, but ideally we get everything."

"Hey, there's our man now," said Kaoru looking up at the sound of footsteps that turned out to be Kyouya's.

The dark-haired young man peered down the shelves at the twins, who had hidden themselves away in the maze of stacks in the basement of the library, an area usually reserved for intense research and secret romance.

"What are you two doing?" he asked suspiciously.

"We might ask the same of you," replied Hikaru.

"Well?" Kyouya promoted.

"Research," said Kaoru, trying not to grin.

"Why don't I believe you?" the older boy asked himself as he walked towards the twins.

"We are!" said Hikaru indigently.

"Keep it down," whispered Kaoru.

"And what exactly are you reaching?" asked Kyouya coolly.

"How to hack into the headmaster's computer," Hikaru promptly replied.

Kyouya stared at them for a long moment and then sighed.

"No," he said and turned and began to walk away.

"But Kyouya-," the twins said together.

"No." He kept walking.

"He'd never give up on one of us," called Hikaru.

"Maybe once he gets out he'll be able to live a normal life," said Kyouya dully. He had be thinking about it a lot, almost constantly in fact, and the best conclusion he could come to was that maybe the place his Tamaki had been sent off to really could help him and that maybe the blond would be normal once more and that maybe it was for the best.

"And who wants that?" asked Kaoru. "Normal, but empty, no way."

Kyouya stopped.

"What would you have me do, then?" he asked without turning back.

"Help us hack into his dad's computer and figure out where he is," replied Hikaru in the voice of someone who has explained something to someone too many times.

"It won't work."

"How do you know?"

"I tried."

"Oh."

The twins glanced at each other, silently agreeing that their oh so brilliant plan was not going to work.

"And?" Hikaru prompted at last.

"And it didn't work," said Kyouya in a tone that implied staggering stupidity.

"Then what are you going to do?" Kaoru asked.

"The only thing I can, I suppose."

"Nothing?" asked Hikaru sharply.

"No," was the cool response.

"What then?"

Kyouya did not answer, he just lifted his gaze over his glasses as if he could see out of the basement and into the administrative building that stood opposite the library.

The twins exchanged another look.

"I'll see you two around," Kyouya said, returning to his current location. "Remind Haruhi to keep her act up. She'll only get in trouble if the truth gets out now." With that he turned and walked away leaving to twins to wonder, somewhat fearfully, what stupid thing he was going to do this time.


	16. How to Save a Life

_AN: I couldn't find Tamaki's father's first name so I had to just refer to him by his family name. Also, I couldn't remember what, if anything, I'd done in past chapters about honorifics so I choice to go with English versions as it's simpler and I'm not 100% sure when to use which. I also put names in the English order (I think I fixed them) to fit with the English honorifics. I'm sorry if this bothers anyone, but it's a lot easier for me._

--

"Kyouya Ootori?"

"Yes?" said Kyouya, standing politely.

"He'll see you now."

"Thank you." Kyouya smiled at the pretty young secretary as he passed her, not one hint of nervousness or fear showing on his handsome face. He crossed the waiting room and gently pushed open the office door. "Sir?" he asked as he stepped into the room.

"Kyouya Ootori," the man behind the desk acknowledged. "Sit down."

"Thank you, sir," said Kyouya as he obeyed. "And thank you for seeing me. In all honesty, I'm rather surprised."

"As am I, surprised that you wanted to see me, that is." The man smiled at him, but it was the sort of smile that people of extremely high status learn to put on when it is appropriate to smile.

Still, despite the fact that the smile held nothing, Kyouya was suddenly struck with how similar the man's face was to his son's. He glanced around the office. It was large, a corner room with massive windows and polished wooden surfaces. It exuded power, but it was open and, though not exactly friendly, welcoming in a reserved sort of way.

"What did you want to speak to me about, Kyouya?" asked Mr. Suoh.

"I think you know, sir," Kyouya said, not showing fear.

Tamaki's father nodded and waited for him to continue.

Kyouya lowered his eyes for the first time and thought for a brief moment. Up until this moment he had been determined not to back down, not the break or give in, but now he wasn't sure he could do it. He had meant to come in, cut to the chase, and get it over with, but he could feel stupid words about miniscule flaws in his teachers forming in his mouth.

_Do it, damn it! Just say it!_ he told himself._ Just say what your feeling before it's too late. This is the only choice I have. I love him. I love him._

"I know what you did to Tamaki," he said, meeting his superintendent's eyes.

Mr. Suohraised his eyebrows, but his face remand passive.

"I think we both know how wrong, how terrible, a thing that was to do to him. I'd try to express it, but I don't think I can. You betrayed your own son, betrayed him for something he couldn't help. Surely you can understand something like that. After all, Tamaki came from forbidden romance, did he not?" Kyouya could see that he was starting to get to the man sitting calmly across from him. He had to keep his cool. He mustn't attack the one man who had the power to save Tamaki. "Yes, we're in love, but what does that change? Nothing. He's still your son and as his father I'd have thought you'd want what's best for him." _So much for not attacking..._

"This is what's best for him," he said tightly.

Kyouya could see how tense Tamaki's father was. This was not going to end well; he could feel it already.

"What's best for him?" Kyouya gave a derisive half-laugh. "Taking him out of school? Away from his friends? His family? Everything he cares about? Taking away everything that matters to him? How in God's name is that what's best for him?" Kyouya could feel his mouth curled into a scathing smirk and he knew he was far acrossed the line he had meant to toe, but he did not care. Tamaki was all that mattered. "Let me tell you one thing, sir, at the end of last year, I thought I'd lost everything that mattered to me and it very nearly killed me – literally, as I'm sure you know. I've got the scars to prove it. I can't imagine what it must have been like for Tamaki to find me lying there, to think he was seeing me dead and I sure as hell don't want to find out."

"What do you mean by that?" spat the super intendent.

"Do you really not see where I'm going with this?" he asked scornfully. "I hate myself for putting Tamaki through that and I'm sure you'd hate to go through the same pain."

Kyouya could tell Tamaki's father did not want to hear, to understand, what he was saying, but he kept on going, getting blunter and blunter.

"If you don't get him out of there, if you don't give him something to live for, what do you think that's going to do to him?"

Mr. Suohshook his head slowly.

"You're killing him!" Kyouya shouted, jumping to his feet as his fury burst from him at full force. "You're killing him and I won't let you! I can't let what happened to me happen to him! Do you know what's it like to die inside like that while you're forced to helpless watch as everything you have, everything you love, is taken away from you? Do you? Well I do. Twice now. Twice, I've lost it all. Last time it was just me, but now it's him too and I can't sit by anymore while I know that's he's in anything like the pain I'm in. I can't and I won't." Kyouya was breathing heavily, shaking, and glaring with his death grey eyes at this man, the father of his lover, the man who'd smashed his world into a thousand bleeding pieces, this man who seemed to care nothing at all, this man who had no idea of what he'd done, of how much pain he'd caused.

"Really? What are you going to do then?" he asked as he stood up to face Kyouya, his hands balled into fists in a failed effort to prevent them from shaking.

"Whatever it takes."

"So you have no plan?"

"Either you cannot comprehend the agony you're causing or you care nothing for your son," Kyouya growled, dogging the question to which the unspoken answer was "this is my plan."

"I care for him more than you can possibly imagine!" shouted Mr. Suoh, snapping completely at last.

"Bullshit! _I'm_ risking everything to try to get him back from that hell _you've_ thrown him in to try to save your own sorry skin from some stupid scandal that wouldn't have happened if you'd keep your mouth shut! I love him!" Kyouya yelled right back.

"You don't know what love is!" yelled Tamaki's father, his face red, his eyes blazing with a fury equal to Kyouya's.

"Not by your definition," Kyouya spat.

"Protection?"

"Torture!"

_Damn it, damn it, damn it!_ thought Kyouya furiously. _I was supposed to stay calm; I was supposed to reason with him; I was supposed to make him see sense. I was _not _supposed to have a shouting match with him and get him so angry he won't even listen._

Mr. Suohwas suddenly oddly still. He was still breathing like an enraged beast, but his gaze was steady as he watched Kyouya try to control himself. The two just stared at each other for a long moment, each waiting for the other to look away, to break.

"I love your son, sir," said Kyouya. Though his breathing was still somewhat ragged, his voice was calm and his eyes were locked on Mr. Suoh's. "I love Tamaki and nothing you do can ever change that. Maybe someday he won't love me anymore, but I know that I will always love him. I know I will always do anything for him."

Kyouya waited for the answer he was sure would come. It was the answer he had set himself up for. Surely Tamaki's father would play the "the only way you can help him is to let him forget about you" card. It was so obvious, so terrible, so perfect. He watched as coolly as he could as the man standing across from him took a breath to speak, watched the words forming in his mind, moving to his mouth, watched as the lips that were so like Tamaki's parted to condemn him to this hell forever.

"You truly believe it all, don't you?" he said, sitting down with a small sigh.

Kyouya stared at him for a minute before he even comprehended to words.

"Oh not you too!" he cried in disgust as his sister's words came back to him.

_"It isn't love, Kyouya. Lust and love are not the same thing ... Two boys cannot truly love each other the way you seem to think."_

"What?" asked the superintendent, truly confused.

"Nothing," said Kyouya quickly, "something my sister said. And yes, I do believe everything I've said. I believe it because it's true, sir." He sat down again as well, clinging to the calm he managed to regain, praying that he did not loose his head again.

"You," he seemed to struggle for a moment, "love my son."

"Yes," said Kyouya dully.

"And you believe he returns these, uh, feelings."

"He does."

Tamaki's father sighed. It was not the sigh of defeat Kyouya wished it to be, but it wasn't the sound of him being thrown out of the office either.

"I have to do what's best for my son."

Kyouya screamed inside. They were right back where they started!

"Sir, I believe we've covered this already," he said tensely.

"Tamaki isn't going to kill himself."

Kyouya was fairly sure that he was right, but he wasn't about to admit it.

"So that makes the pain he's in Okay?"

"It's the only way he's going to recover."

"He isn't going to "recover," sir; there's nothing wrong with him. Please listen to me, sir. There's nothing wrong with Tamaki. He's rather unusual, of course, and he's never been exactly "normal," but that's one of the things that's so wonderful about him. We might be crazy for loving each other, but not because we're both boys, because he's eccentric and I'm reserved, because he's too free and I'm too caged, because he's emotion and I'm numbers, because he's everything I'm not. Don't you see? We can't help it. We know it might be crazy, but we also know it's anything but wrong. Love, this kind of love, is never wrong. He isn't fixable, sir, not because he's too far gone, but because he isn't broken. He's prefect, sir. He's prefect, but he's suffering and I won't let that go on. I'll burn that place to the ground, I'll keep fighting until I drop down dead, I'll do whatever it takes to get him out of there, to get him back in my arms."

Kyouya did not know what else he could say to this man to try to save Tamaki. Surely he had proven his love, his determination. He did not know how else he could prove that there was not a thing wrong with Tamaki. Underneath his cool façade he was drowning in emotions, loosing words and logic in the waves of anguish and love. All he could do was wait for Mr. Suoh's reply.

"So you think that I should simply let this," he paused to search for a word to describe what was between his son and the boy sitting before him, but seemed unable to find one, "go on?"

"Yes."

"Do you have any _idea_ what this could do to Tamaki? To yourself? To both your families?"

"Yes. I've given it a great deal of thought."

"Then you should understand." There was a note of finality in his voice.

"Sir, please answer one question for me. Is this about saving Tamaki or saving your family's reputation?" Kyouya asked coldly.

"Nothing matters more to me than my son," he said sharply.

"That doesn't answer my question," Kyouya replied mentally adding _or explain why you only brought him into your family when you realized you needed an heir._

"What's best for my son is what's best for my family."

"So this is about reputation, not your personal morals?" Kyouya paused to regain a hold on his tempter before going on. "Sir, no one need ever know about this. In fact, it's much more likely to get out now that you've drawn extra attention to Tamaki by pulling him out of school. I'd say your best option is to make up a cover story about him coming down with some horrible disease and getting miraculously cured and then make a public donation to the prevention of said illness. Then all you have to do is wait for it to blow over while he slips quietly back into his normal life and everyone gets to go on just as before and none of this ever happened."

"What about your sister?" he asked shrewdly.

"I think she regrets what she did and if not I'm sure she could be convinced of such." He didn't like implying that his sister could be bought off, but he did think that she could be convinced in some way to keep her mouth shut.

"And what about you and Tamaki?"

"What about us? Everyone knows we're best friends, which, in and of itself may be odd, but at this point no one thinks anything of it. It's perfect."

"And when you grow up?"

"Tamaki does what is fit for his family business and I for mine." He had thought it all out perfectly, with the exception of his future career, which was less than perfect, but would do.

"What about families? Children? Heirs?"

_Is that all you think about?_ wondered Kyouya.

He shrugged. "Adoption. Make it look like charity."

"So you'll just live together?" he asked skeptically, raising an eyebrow.

"Of course not, but it seems easy enough to spend time with the one you love." He kept his face placid hoping the superintendent would either miss or ignore this jibe at his extramarital affair.

"You seem to have given this a great deal of thought."

"Of course." Kyouya smiled slightly. He had his footing again. Planning was one thing he was very good at. "If you have any further questions, I'm sure I can answer them."

Mr. Suohthought for a minute while Kyouya watched.

"You both touched on my relationship with Tamaki's mother," he mused. "I will not be guilted into anything, but he is my only son and I love him." He fell silent for what seemed to Kyouya to be a very, _very_ long time. Then he seemed to suddenly come to life again and he opened a drawer or his desk and pulled out a small piece of paper. He looked at it for moment before handing it to Kyouya.

Kyouya took the paper and looked at it. On it was a phone number with an extension. He looked back up at Tamaki's father who wordlessly pushed the phone across the desk to him. Kyouya picked up the receiver and dialed the number.

"If you have an extension please dial it now, if not-."

Kyouya dialed the extension.

The phone rang and rang and rang and Kyouya was sure no one was going to pick up. He tried to ignore the knot in his stomach as he waited. This could not be the number he barely dared to hope it was. Finally, the ringing was cut short.

"Hello?" said a dull, passionless voice.

For a moment Kyouya could not speak. He knew that voice, but at the same time it was the voice of a stranger. It was empty, hollow, emotionless. It was the voice of a person who knew he was dying and just had to wait out of the pain he had long ago gotten used to.

"Hello?" said the voice again.

"Ta-Tamaki?" Kyouya managed to ask.

Silence.

"Tamaki?" Kyouya said again, a little louder.

"Kyouya?" Tamaki sounded like he was going to cry or maybe faint. "No." His voice was broken and he spoke as if he would not allow himself to believe it really was Kyouya because he knew it would only destroy him a little more.

"Tamaki, it's me," Kyouya said, his own voice growing weak and shaky. "It's Kyouya."

"No," he said again, with a bit more determination.

"My god, Tamaki, what have they done to you? It's me; it's really me. Please believe me."

"No! What the hell is this? I'm not going to fall for any more of this crap!" Kyouya could barely recognize Tamaki's voice now and if it wasn't for the broken look on his father's face Kyouya would not have believed he was truly speaking to Tamaki.

"Tamaki, _mon __amour. __Je t'aime._" It seemed the only way he might prove himself to Tamaki.

"_Je sais_," came the automatic response. There was nothing for a long moment while Tamaki processed what had happened. "KYOUYA!" he shouted so loudly that both Kyouya and Tamaki's father jumped. "Kyouya, oh my god, Kyouya!"

"Tamaki, it's me; it's Okay. I'm going to get you out of there. I promise. You're gunna come home."

"How? They don't want me there anymore," said Tamaki bitterly, the dullness creeping back into his voice.

"No, no, they do," said Kyouya soothingly. "I'm gunna make it better; I'm gunna fix it. Everything's going to be just fine."

"How can you be so sure?" he asked sounding defeated.

"I think if you'll get me put someone else on for a minute you'll agree with me."

"No!" he cried franticly. "Don't go!"

"I'll come back, just listen for a second alright?" He covered up the mouthpiece of the phone and whispered to Tamaki's father. "Tell him I'm right. Tell him he's coming home." Kyouya held out the phone to him.

Mr. Suoh looked at the receiver in Kyouya's hand for a long moment. Kyouya's heart was beating wildly. _If I've just lied to Tamaki..._ But then Tamaki's father took the phone from Kyouya and held it up to his ear.

"Tamaki? ... Yes. ... Yes, He's right. It's going to be Okay. ... You're coming home. ... Here you go." He handed the phone back to Kyouya, who looked just as cool as ever although he was beaming inside.

"Tamaki?"

"It's really true!" he cried, his voice know the one that Kyouya knew and loved.

"I told you so."

"I didn't think you'd lie, but I didn't see how it could be true."

"I know."

"When will I be with you?"

"Soon."

"How soon?"

"I don't know, but I'm sure your father will be coming to get you very, very soon." He watched the man in question for a reaction and he nodded. "You should get yourself packed; I'm sure you'll be out of there and back here before you know it."

"What is every one going to say?" he asked.

"There's a cover story. Don't worry, I'll explain every thing to you when I see you."

"I have to go," said Tamaki suddenly.

"Why?"

"Calls automatically cut off and I think it's going to in a second."

"Your father will call them and get you out of there, Okay? And I'll see you as soon as you're home. Everything's going to be alright."

"Okay."

"I-," Kyouya began, but just as Tamaki had said the call cut off and he heard an automated voice.

"Your call has been disconnected in the interest of the student. To reach the main desk press one now, to-,"

Kyouya pressed one and handed the phone wordlessly to Tamaki's father.

"Hello? This is Mr. Suoh. ... Yes, Tamaki, my son. ... I want to bring him home. ... I don't care! He's coming home. ... So you said, but I still don't care. ... I'm his father! ... He's not finishing your stupid program; he's coming home! ... I will send someone to pick him up at five o'clock tomorrow whether you like it or not! ... They'll have a letter from me and they will bring Tamaki home. ... Yes. ... Now we're getting somewhere. ... I'll fax it to you immediately. ... Thank you." He slammed down the phone and turned to his computer. He worked for a few minutes while Kyouya sat in silence. The printer spit out a document, which Tamaki's father handed to Kyouya. "I will get the letter to you to take to those people tomorrow morning. Bring him straight home. I'll be there waiting for you."

"Alright."

"You may go."

"Thank you, sir. Thank you."

Kyouya stood up and left the office. Only then did he turn his attention to the paper Tamaki's father had given him. It was directions, directions to the place where Tamaki was. Kyouya stopped in the middle of the hall and closed his eyes, trying to steady his breathing and control his emotions. There was no way in heaven or hell that he had just convinced Mr. Suohthat allowing his son to continue on in a relationship with another boy was a good idea and maybe he hadn't, but he had at least convinced him to get Tamaki away from that place and he would be the one to go pick his lover up.

Kyouya opened his eyes and kept on walking down the hall. All he had to do now was agree on details for the cover story with Tamaki's father and deal with his sister. No problem.

--

_I know, I know, it's a total _deus ex machina_, but it's the best I could do._


	17. Reunion

"Are you _sure_ this is the right place?" Kyouya asked his driver yet again. "This looks like a prison to me."

"This is where your direction say to go, sir."

"Alright then. Wait for me here." Kyouya checked once more that he had the envelope containing the letter from Tamaki's father and got out of the car. He walked up to the extremely sturdy looking double doors and rang the bell.

"Yes?" said a curt voice.

Kyouya noticed the intercom system beside the door and turned it.

"My name is Kyouya Ootori. I'm here on behalf of Mr. Suohto pick up his son, Tamaki Suoh," he said formally.

"You have the proper documentation?"

"I believe a large portion of it was faxed to you yesterday, but I have the rest."

"Let me check."

Kyouya waited impatiently for a minute until the voice crackled back to life.

"That seems to be in order. Someone will bring the student in question out to you. Please remain where you are."

Kyouya waited. Nearly twenty minutes later, one of the doors creaked open and a woman in a nurse's white, impersonal uniform appeared with a pale, disheveled blond behind her.

"Your paper work?" she asked, blocking the boy from leaving the building.

Kyouya wordlessly handed her the envelope. She examined it for several minutes before she was satisfied.

"That seems to be in order," she said sounding eerily like the voice from the intercom although they were clearly different people.

"May we go?" asked Kyouya.

The nurse seemed to hesitate as if trying to find a reason to refuse.

"Everything is in order. We expect a call from Mr. Suohto confirm his son's arrival at home."

"Yes."

She turned to the boy behind her.

"Be a good boy now and remember what you've learned."

The boy made a small sound in his throat.

"What have you learned?" she prompted, her forced cheerfulness faltering.

"I'm done spouting your lies, ma'am," said the boy in a tone that reminded Kyouya horribly of his own.

The nurse did not move for a long moment and then she spoke in a cool, even tone.

"Have you got your things?"

"Yes," said the boy dully.

"If everything's in order, then you may go." She stepped aside and the boy emerged, blinking, into the early evening light.

He was holding a single suitcase and did not glance at the nurse as he started to walk towards the waiting car.

"Thanks, I'll have him call," said Kyouya stiffly before walking quickly to catch up with Tamaki.

The blond did not look at Kyouya as he fell into step beside him. He stared straight ahead without seeming to see anything but the car that would take him away from this hell. When the reached the vehicle, the driver jumped out and opened the trunk for Tamaki's bag before opening the back doors for the two boys and making sure they were comfortably inside.

"Where to, sir?" he asked, settling himself back into the front seat.

"The Suohresidence," Kyouya replied before pushing the button that would raise the screen to block the diver out of his and Tamaki's world.

Kyouya watched the blond sitting mutely next to him. He looked terrible. In the short time he had been away, Tamaki had changed. He looked gaunter, his hair less blond, his eyes less lilac, his soul less brilliant. Kyouya looked at Tamaki and saw a horrible reflection of himself: a silent boy with a broken soul who had lost everything one too many times to believe in good anymore. There was no laughter in his dull eyes, no smile on his pale lips, no life in his wan face. This boy could not possibly be Tamaki. This boy who would not look at him, this boy who said nothing, this boy who just wanted the pain to stop, this boy was a stranger.

"Tamaki," Kyouya whispered sadly. "Tamaki, look at me."

Slowly the blond turned his hair to look at the boy sitting next to him.

"Yes," he said.

"I'm not sure I even want to know what they did to you and I doubt you want to talk about it, but," he shook his head in disbelief, "can, can I help you? Can I save you?"

Tamaki just stared blankly at him.

"You saved my life last year, you know that Tamaki. Your love-. And I'll do the same for you. I can pull you back, just like you did for me. Just let me. Please." His mouth was dry. He was at a total loss for what to do. Tamaki had sounded bad on the phone, but he had at least seemed alive.

"What's gunna happen to me?" he said at last.

"It's going to go to be Okay. It's going to be how it was."

"No. No, it can't. It can't be how it was."

Kyouya knew he was right, but he didn't want to admit it.

"And what about us? What's gunna happen to that?"

Kyouya could see tears in Tamaki's eyes now. As much as it hurt to see Tamaki in such pain, at least he felt _something_.

"How do you want it to be?" he asked.

"I don't know."

Kyouya looked away for a moment and then back at Tamaki.

"I love you, Tamaki. I love you and nothing can ever or will ever change that. And don't think I'm agreeing with your father. He could hardly have done anything worse to you, but I do want what's best for you and if that means I have to loose you, then so be it. Just tell me how I can make you happy, how I can make you whole again." He swallowed back the tears and pain and waited for Tamaki to speak.

Tamaki took a deep breath and final spoke in a low voice. "Kyouya, don't hate me for saying this. I _think_ I still love you, I _want_ to still love you, but I don't know if I can. I don't know if I can feel _anything_ anymore. I don't feel like me; I don't feel like anything. Nothing mattered, but getting out of there, getting back to you because god knows what was happening to you. You were all that kept me going, but now... I mean, here we are and I don't feel anything. It's all numb." There was such sadness in the dull lilac eyes.

"Let me help you. We can put it back together. I promise. I'll do whatever it takes."

"I know you will, but I don't know if it'll work. I can't even tell you what they did to me, but they broke me, Kyouya, and I was so sure you'd be able to fix it all, but now I just don't know."

"I know, but I can and I will. It'll just take time." He looked at Tamaki, who now looked more like a puppy that had been horribly abused before being abandoned by the side of road in a puddle of oil. "Come here." He reached out for his broken lover.

Tamaki hesitated for a moment before scooting across the seat to nestle in Kyouya's arms. Kyouya held the now shaking boy to his chest and buried his face in the limp, blond hair. He could feel Tamaki start to cry before he could hear the sobs. He just held him, rubbing his back and whispering soothing words.

Kyouya felt the car slowing and looked up to see Tamaki's house.

"Tamaki, you're home. Do you want to clean up?' He gently pulled away from Tamaki and offered him a tissue.

"Thanks," he mumbled, wiping his eyes. "Do I look Okay?"

"Other than the fact that you look like you just got out of prison for something you didn't do, you look fine."

"Kyouya!" cried Tamaki, smacking him on the arm.

"Not to be morbid, but I think it's best if your father see what he's done to you. Maybe then he'll really believe me." He gave Tamaki a wry smile.

"Yeah."

"You ready?"

"I guess so."

They got out of the car and Kyouya motioned to the driver to wait. He firmly took Tamaki's hand and they began to walk towards the house.

The conversation that followed took a lot of control. Looking back, Kyouya was astonished he kept his composure as he had spent so much time lately very near and even over the breaking point.

After seeing what had happened to his son, Tamaki's father finally seemed convinced that he had done the right thing in letting Tamaki come home and was starting to come round to the idea that maybe Kyouya was good from his son. They also agreed on a story, which they would quietly spread, but only when questions were asked. Kyouya made a mental note to make sure the Host Club got the story ASAP before turning his attention to their last danger.

"Now, what about your sister?" asked Tamaki's father.

"I'll deal with her, sir."

"If you need any assistance-."

"Of course. Thank you."

There was an awkward pause.

"I should go, Tamaki," Kyouya said gently.

"No," he said at once, more than a hint of desperation in his voice.

"I'll see you school tomorrow, won't I?"

Tamaki looked at his father who nodded.

"Just come to the Third Music Room after school; we'll get the rest of this sorted out. Get some rest."

"Okay."

"I'll see you later, then." He smiled at Tamaki and turned to go.

He was at the door when Tamaki dashed across the room and grabbed his wrist. There was such fear in Tamaki's eyes that Kyouya could not leave him.

"Tamaki," he said with a soft sadness in his voice. "You'll be Okay."

"Don't ever leave me."

"I won't, but I have to go home tonight. What's my father going to say when he finds out I've been at the house of someone who's been so deathly ill?" Kyouya's grey eyes flicked to Tamaki's father.

"But-." Tamaki stopped at a look from Kyouya. "Alright." He smiled at Kyouya and gave his hand a squeeze.

The started to move apart, but at the last moment, Tamaki refused to let Kyouya's hand go and jerked the brunet back to his body and kissed him passionately. After he got past the shock, Kyouya was too far in heaven to even remember that Tamaki's father was standing there watching them. He knew that he would be able to get his Tamaki back.


	18. Truth

"So you got some weird disease?" confirmed Kaoru.

Tamaki nodded.

"And you really expect people to buy that?" asked Hikaru.

"People will believe whatever's easiest," said Kyouya coolly. "That's the story we're sticking to, so stick to it, Okay? Tamaki was sick. End of story. That explains why he was gone and why he looks," he shot a glance at Tamaki, "why he doesn't look his best."

"Are we gunna keep going with the Host Club?" asked Hunny.

"Of course," said Tamaki.

"Not yet we aren't," Kyouya said quickly. "You're hardly up to going to class as it is."

"Thanks mom," said Tamaki, rolling his eyes.

Kyouya allowed himself a small smile. Tamaki was indeed recovering. Or at least, he seemed to be. Kyouya suspected that Tamaki was putting up a front for the benefit of their friends.

"Are you sure you're all right?" asked Haruhi.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." Tamaki shrugged.

_Definitely a front._

"Well, if we're done here, I need to get home," she said.

"Yeah, we're done," said Kyouya.

Haruhi grabbed her bag, waved, and headed off. She was shortly followed by the rest of the Host Club. As soon as Tamaki and Kyouya were alone, the blond seemed to deflate. The front fell away and Tamaki looked worse than ever. Kyouya could see how draining the forced cheerfulness had been for Tamaki.

"You don't have to do that, you know," he said quietly.

"Do what?" asked Tamaki dully.

"Pretend for them. They're your friends. They aren't going to run away if you let them see what happened to you."

"They don't need to know."

Kyouya considered this for a moment. It was probably true. Still, keeping up that front all the time couldn't be good for Tamaki.

"Are you Okay being back in school so soon? I'm sure you could stay home if-."

"No!" cried Tamaki, true emotion flaring up. "I- I want to see you."

"Hey, it's Okay. I'm not going anywhere." Kyouya crossed quickly over to where Tamaki was sitting and sat down next to him.

"Kyouya, I don't like this. I don't know what we're going to do." His eyes were desperate.

"What we're going to do is stay together and not let anyone tear us apart again," said Kyouya firmly, putting an arm around Tamaki's thin shoulders.

"But what about after school?"

"We'll be able to go to the same university," he assured the blond.

"That's not what I meant. I meant, what are we going to when we're grown up? We won't be able to live this way."

"Why not? I haven't got a lot to lose and who's going to stop you?" Kyouya asked.

"My grandmother."

"No one lives forever."

"Kyouya," scolded Tamaki.

"What? It's true," said Kyouya, "Tamaki, listen to me. We can live like this. This isn't the Middle Ages. Let people think what they want, who the hell cares?"

"Everyone will hate us." Tamaki spoke with pain, but convection.

"Look, I don't know what kind of stuff they drilled into your head at that place, but it isn't true," said Kyouya firmly. "Sure, some people will hate us, but lots of people won't care. Some people will even respect us."

"Who would respect _this_?" he asked.

"Anyone who believes in standing up for the true, for what's right."

"Kyouya, you're being stupid."

Kyouya tried not to take this remark personally. He knew Tamaki wasn't himself, but it was still a blow.

"Do you want me to go find you a list of famous and respected gay people?"

"Actors? Please."

"And politicians and everything else."

"Company executives?"

"I'm sure. Anyway, since when do you want to run your family's company? Come on, Tamaki, believe me. We _will_ be together."

"I want to believe you, Kyouya," said Tamaki, standing up, "but I can't."

"So is this it then?" asked Kyouya, also standing up. "You're willing to drag yourself to school just to see me, but you can't get your head around the idea that we will always be together? Tamaki, can't you see how little sense you're making? I know they did terrible things to you, but that's over now. You're safe. Trust me, Tamaki, we can be together and still live our lives." Kyouya wasn't sure _he_ believed this, but he knew he had to believe it for Tamaki, even if it seemed utterly illogical. Deep down, it was what they both wanted to be sure of, but neither could really find any truth to cling to.

"You know that's not true.

"Why are you being like this? Snap out of it! No one's going to hurt you for being honest with yourself, Okay? You can want what you want now."

"You were right before."

"What do you mean?"

"Before. When you said we'd only end up getting hurt."

"Tamaki, I'm sorry that happened to you. It shouldn't have been you. It wasn't fair. It wasn't right. But it doesn't mean that we have to lose the one good thing we have. We don't have to give this up." He took a few steps towards Tamaki, closing this distance between them. "I love you, Tamaki. I love you and I always will."

Tamaki stared at him for a long time, while a battle raged inside him. The horrible things he had had beaten into his head recently, the ideals he'd grown up with, his father's love life, Kyouya's words last year, Kyouya's words just now, his family's company, his grandmother, Haruhi, hosting, the way the world was, the way the world should be, what had happened to Kyouya last year, so many things whirling around inside him and underneath it all a massive bubble of emotion that was on the very brink of bursting.

Kyouya gently touched Tamaki's face.

The bubble burst.

Out gushed what truly mattered.

Tamaki opened his mouth as tears formed in his eyes and spoke. He had meant to say "I'm sorry," but that was not what came out.

"_Je t'aime_," he whispered.


	19. Honesty

As the weeks passed, things seemed to return to some semblance of reality and normality. Kyouya still refused to reopen the Host Club, maintaining the Tamaki was not yet up to it. However, the seven hosts often met in the Third Music Room anyway just to hang out. The story of Tamaki's illness had been accepted by anyone who had asked and he had even received rather a massive amount of "get well soon" cards from his female fans.

As for Tamaki himself, he was recovering, though Kyouya was still worried about him. As he slowly perked back up, he began to smile more often and the luster started to return to his hair and the glow to his skin. After a few weeks, the casual observer would have thought he was back to normal. However, Kyouya could see that he lacked some of his usual energy and that his eyes were still dull.

Once again, the friends were gathered in the Third Music Room after school discussing when the Host Club would be up and running again.

"I'm _fine_, Kyouya, really," said Tamaki again.

Kyouya gave him a look.

"I'm good enough to host," he amended, making a face at Kyouya.

"Are you sure?" pressed Kyouya.

"Yes! We've gone over this. I'm fine to go back to hosting. I'd _like_ to go back to hosting."

Had Tamaki not been the king of hosting before, his desire to sit around pleasing pretty girls would have been rather concerning to Kyouya. Even so, he was afraid that Tamaki felt it somehow a necessary element of keeping up his front – a front that Kyouya was still trying to get him to drop.

"Alright," sighed Kyouya. "We'll start again next Monday."

"Yay!" cried Hunny.

"Mmh," said Mori.

The twins exchanged a devious look.

"We should probably put a sign or something so that they'll know," said Haruhi.

"I doubt that will be necessary," said Kyouya. "Every day about twenty girls ask me when the Host Club will be open again. Word will get round without any real effort on our part."

"Monday then," said Tamaki, standing up.

"Are you going?" asked Kyouya quickly.

"Yeah."

As usual Kyouya found himself one of the last two left in the room, but instead of Tamaki, today his companion was Haruhi.

"Do you really think it's a good idea? Opening the club again?" she asked.

"No."

"Then why are you doing it?"

"Well for one thing there's still no stopping Tamaki once he gets an idea in his head. That hasn't changed. For another, getting things back to normal might be good for him." Kyouya grabbed his notebook and walked away from her to take inventory of what they had in their storeroom.

"But you don't want to do it?" pressed Haruhi, following him.

"No."

"Why?"

Kyouya stopped and turned to face it her. If it had been anyone else, he would not have answered this question.

"He needs to learn to be honest with himself again. I don't think hosting will help that."

"He never lies when he hosts," Hauhi pointed out.

"I know, but he's going to have to put up even more of a front than usual. He won't let them see that he's changed."

"He seems to be getting back to normal, though."

"_Seems_ being the operative word."

Haruhi dropped her gaze. She had suspected that Tamaki wasn't letting his friends see how he was really doing, but she had not been able to tell how much he was covering up.

"Is he Okay?" she asked quietly.

Kyouya swallowed. "No. No, of course he's not Okay, but he will be; he's getting better."

"You're being really brave for him."

Kyouya shot her a look. It was a very Haruhi thing to say, but the truth still caught him off guard.

"I'm trying."

"He's scared, isn't he, about what's going to happen to you two?"

"He's convinced that there's no way we can be together," Kyouya explained.

"Are you?" she asked.

Kyouya had to think about this. He had put so much effort into trying to get Tamaki to believe that they could indeed be together that he hadn't given much thought to how he felt about the matter. Of course he _wanted_ them to be together but he had not been able to ignore the truth that he so often found in Tamaki's words.

"No, but it won't be easy," he said at last.

"But you'll do it."

"I'll try."

"You love him, Kyouya; you can't let him go. This kind of thing doesn't come along every day. You won't lose it." Her voice was so earnest, her words so honest.

"I'm trying to get him to see that again. He's coming round, but they really broke him at that place."

"He saved you last year. You'll save him now." She smiled confidently. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow."

Kyouya bid her good-bye and hoped she was right.


	20. Fine

The scene and feel in the Host Club the following Monday reminded Kyouya of the pervious spring when the Host Club had reopened. He hoped they never again had to reopen after the "death" and return of a member.

"Are you sure it's alright to not be going all out?" asked Tamaki again.

"Yes. It's what we did when-," he stopped himself. "It's what we did last year and it went just fine, better than usual if anything. They'll be too glad to see us again to care what it looks like it here."

"Okay, if you're sure."

"I'm sure."

Tamaki nodded and Kyouya gently grabbed his lover's hand and pulled his aside.

"Don't kill yourself doing this, Okay?"

"What do you mean?" asked Tamaki, avoiding Kyouya's gaze.

"We both know you're hardly up to this. Don't mess yourself up for those girls. They aren't worth it."

Tamaki frowned, but nodded.

That afternoon, Kyouya tried his best to keep an eye on Tamaki, but he had his own costumers to take care of. However, when he _did_ get a moment to watch the blond, he could see nothing different. Tamaki was in his element, surrounded by swooning girls and practically glowing with princely charm. No one in a million years would have guessed anything had happened to him.

Part way through the afternoon, Tamaki caught Kyouya's eye over the head of a glassy-eyed girl. For a moment Kyouya feared something was wrong, but Tamaki only smiled as if to say "see? I can do this." Kyouya gave a tiny smile and a tiny nod. Maybe Tamaki was putting up less of a front than he had thought.

At the end of day when all the love-struck girls had left, the Hosts sat around comparing notes.

"Well that went well," said Hikaru.

"Was that sarcasm?" asked Kyouya.

"No," said Karoru.

The twins exchanged a devious look.

"The brotherly love act never gets old?" asked Haruhi.

The twins just smirked.

"Are you Okay, Tama-chan?" asked Hunny.

"Never better," said Tamaki, smiling. "I told you I was fine, Kyouya." He gave his love a scolding smile.

Kyouya rolled his eyes.

After the others had finally gone, Kyouya turned his full attention to Tamaki.

"So how much of that was a front?" he asked bluntly.

"What do you mean? I'm honest when I host."

"I know, but are you really Okay?"

"I'm fine. I promise, Kyouya."

"So if I told you that we'll never be parted again and that we'll spend the rest of our lives together, would you still be fine?" he asked.

"Is that the sort of thing you're likely to say?" asked Tamaki, somewhat on guard.

"Tamaki," said Kyouya seriously. "I will never let anything or anyone separate us again and we _will_, so long as you'll have me, spend the rest of our lives together."

Tamaki stared at him for a long moment, his face unreadable. He swallowed.

"How?" he whispered.

"That doesn't matter. We will. Are you still fine?"

Kyouya could see the conflict behind the eyes that were still somehow not as bright as they had been. Tamaki bit his lip. His family. His love. His future. His love. His society. His love.

"Yes," he whispered. "Yes, I am."

Kyouya could hardly believe it and for a moment he didn't. He almost asked "what?" but he didn't. He just gazed back at Tamaki for a long moment. Then he nodded, lost for words.

"I love you, Kyouya."

Tamaki gently pulled the stunned brunette to him and kissed his with soft passion.

When they parted, Kyouya looked into Tamaki's shining lilac eyes, brighter than ever full of joy and life and love.


	21. Epilogue

AN: Ok, this is it: the last chapter. I know it took me about a million years to upload it and I'm sorry, but it's finally up and I hope it's not a horrible ending. It does get a little stupid at the end; I'll be the first to admit it, but with a saga like this, I couldn't help myself.

* * *

Eleven Years Later

* * *

"Took them long enough. God, these journalists are slow," said Kyouya, throwing the paper he'd been reading onto the coffee table.

"What is it?" asked Tamaki, reaching for the paper.

"Don't worry about it," Kyouay said, a little to quickly.

Tamaki snatched the paper from the table, dodging Kyouya's attempts to stop him. He scanned the page while Kyouya watched him.

"Oh for crying out loud!" Tamaki exclaimed. ""Suoh-Ootori Relationship Exposed."" He read aloud. ""It has recently come to light that CEO Tamaki Suoh and high-power administrator Kyouya Ootori have been living together since high school. What had been assumed to be a close friendship has been revealed to be a romantic entanglement that has cost both families dearly." What is this?" He glanced at the top of the page. "Seriously? I thought this was supposed to be a good paper."

"Tamaki-."

"I mean, they're writing this like they're a tabloid." He scanned the rest of the article. ""Cost both families dearly?" "Illicit Relationship?" "Imminent scandal?" "Unknown if either men will speak to these accusations?" "Not-so-platonic love?" It's not like they found a body in the backyard or something. Come on, grow up people!"

"Tamaki-."

"How did they find out anyway? Did someone tell them? And what took them so long? They're talking like it was some deep, dark secret. Surely people have seen us going home and stuff before? People see us in public together all the time. _And_ they expect us to do something about it. What _they_ think is not _our_ problem, but if we don't say something it'll be like "Suoh and Ootori Deny Illicit Relationship." Seriously, what do you have to do to get it right? It's not like we've done something terrible. I mean-."

"Tamaki!" Kyouya practically shouted, grabbing the paper back from Tamaki and throwing it on the sofa.

"What?"

Kyouya had to take a deep breath to keep himself from smacking his endearingly clueless lover.

"Well, one, how about calming down? We both knew this would happen sooner or later."

"Yeah, but-."

"Two, I thought we decided back at Ouran that this was going to be a non-issue when it did happen."

"I know, but-."

"Three, it doesn't matter how they found out. Maybe it was a slow news day."

"Maybe, but what if-?"

"And four," continued Kyouya, raising his voice again to drown out Tamaki's protests. "What we are going to do is wait until someone asks us about it and then calmly point out that we've been living together since university, not high school, that we have never made an effort to hide it and that it's not an issue," Kyouya finished calmly.

"But Kyouya!"

"What?"

"How can they talk about us like that?"

"They talk about everyone like that."

"We haven't done anything!"

"No."

"So why are they attacking us?"

"That's how journalism works. Would it make you feel better if I got us on some high-profile talk show?" He pulled out his phone.

"No."

"Alright then, what would you like me to do about it?"

"I don't know," said Tamaki petulantly.

"Tamaki," said Kyouya gently. "We've always known this was going to happen and we agreed that it doesn't matter. No matter what they say about us, we'll always have each other and that's what counts."

Tamaki bit his lip, his mind clearly eleven years in the past.

Kyouya took Tamaki's hand. "I won't let anyone hurt you, remember?"

"I know, I just-." Tamaki sighed, unable to find the right words.

"I know, but that's all in the past now. We've got each other just like always. Nothing else matters." He gave Tamaki's hand a squeeze before picking the paper up again. "Now, do you want me to sue them for libel?"

"What? Why? It's true."

"Not entirely. We haven't been living together since high school, nor have we "shattered our families." I suppose it might not be enough to make a case out of, but it is at least enough to make sure the next article they run about us is more _accurate_."

"Is it really going to be Okay, Kyouya?" asked Tamaki, his lilac eyes full of a child-like fear.

"It's going to be fine, Tamaki. You've just become head of your family's company and you've already made huge improvements; you've got everyone from the board of directors to the janitors singing your praises. No one can touch you, not even with this."

"What about you?"

"Me?" He shrugged. "I'll be fine. Don't worry about me. I can take care of it."

"I know." Tamaki gazed at Kyouya admiringly. "So do we send out a rebuttal or do we wait?" he asked.

"Hell, we could have a massive bidding war over an interview. We wait for them to come to us."

Right on cue, Kyouya's phone rang. Tamaki's had been ringing almost non-stop with calls from his frantic secretary and family since the paper had come out several hours earlier, but, as it was on vibrate and buried at the bottom on his laundry hamper, he hadn't heard it. Kyouya had been ignoring the constant stream of calls he'd been getting up until now when he answered it.

"Kyouya Ootori. . . . Of course. . . . I was busy. . . . Yes, we'll talk to them. . . . Don't sound so stunned. We've had this planned out for years. . . . Whichever one is the least sleazy and pays the best. . . . Figure it out. . . . Call me with the numbers before you accept. . . . Okay. . . . Thanks." He hit the end button and set his phone down on the table.

"Interview it is, then?" asked Tamaki.

"She should have it set up in about half an hour, I'd say, depending on how long she has to spend on hold." Kyouya's secretary was very efficient - almost as efficient as Kyouya himself.

Indeed they did not have to wait long for Kyouya's phone to ring again.

"Kyouya Ootori. . . . Which one? . . . Alright, how much? . . . Was that the most? . . . Excellent. . . . No, I think it's best to go with a paper. . . . Yes, go ahead with it. . . . Let me know the time. . . . Thanks." He hung up. "She's going to get us one with a prestigious paper, big competitor of that rag." He jerked his head at the paper, which had slid onto the floor. "We should have it later today if that's Okay."

"Okay."

* * *

Kyouya wasn't surprised to find the paparazzi on the doorstep. He'd made sure to close the blinds and currents the second he'd seen the article and had managed to keep Tamaki away from the windows, but of course there was not avoiding the cameras as they walked the short distance to the car Kyouya had called for.

"Mr. Ootori! Mr. Suoh! Is it true about your relationship?"

"How is your family taking the news?"

"Who told the paper about you two?"

Kyouya marched Tamaki firmly through the crowd, his hand on the small on his back.

"No comment," said Kyouya coolly, when one of the many mics ended up in his face.

Once they had made it to the car, Tamaki turned to Kyouya, wide-eyed and a bit pale.

"Oh god."

"Don't worry about them."

"How?" asked Tamaki hollowly.

"Just don't worry about it."

It did not take them long to arrive at the main building of the newspaper. A curious young man met them at the door and led up to the elevator where the trio stood in awkward silence as the young man shot side-long glances at the famous couple. Kyouya ignored this, but it made Tamaki even more nervous.

"Right this way, sirs," said the young man when they got out of the elevator. He showed them down the hall to a small, but elegant room with an armchair, sofa, and coffee table that was used to interview famous people. "Here we are. Please, have a set." He indicated the sofa. "Someone will be right with you. In the mean time, can I get you anything?"

Tamaki shook his head, his eyes still wide with fear.

"Nothing, thank you," said Kyouya calmly.

"Very good sirs." The young man gave an awkward little bow and left.

"Tamaki, calm down," said Kyouya once the young man had gone.

"What was with him?" Tamaki whispered.

"Probably just some closeted kid who was too shocked by the idea that people can be open about their personal lives to know what to do with himself." He shrugged.

"Oh." Tamaki thought about this for a minute. "So are we going to be an example or something?"

"It's quite possible."

"Oh." Tamaki looked around the room. "What should I say?" he asked.

"You don't have to say anything if you don't want to. I'll do the talking if you like."

"Okay. Well, is there anything I _shouldn't_ say?"

"Just don't say anything you wouldn't want to see in the paper."

At that moment, the door opened and a middle-aged journalist entered the room.

"Ah, Mr. Ootori, Mr. Suoh, so nice of you to grant us this interview. My name is Matsuda. I'm one of the senior editors here at the paper."

"Nice to meet you," said Kyouya, shaking the offered hand.

"The pleasure is entirely mine."

He seemed like a nice enough man and he soon had Tamaki and Kyouya settled on the sofa and he sat down across from them in the chair.

"Do you mind if I record this conversation?" he asked taking a small tape recorder out of his pocket. "I can't write as fast as I used to." He laughed.

"Not at all. That is, of course, why we are here," said Kyouya.

"Of course," agreed Mr. Matsuda, placing the tape recorder on the table and pressing the record button. "Shall we beginning?" he asked, taking a small pad and pen from another pocket and preparing to write.

"Yes," said Kyouya.

"Well, let us first establish exactly what has been said about you." He consulted his pad.

"We are well aware of what was printed this morning," said Kyouya curtly.

"Well then, permit me to cut to the chase. Are you and Mr. Suoh living together?" he asked addressing the more vocal Kyouya.

"Yes."

"And you have been living together since...?" asked the journalist, smoothly covering his surprise at Kyouya's calm declaration.

"University," he said and then added "Not high school," as if determined to correct the faulty article.

"So nearly ten years?"

"Yes, I suppose so."

"And how would you describe your relationship?"

Kyouya considered this for a moment, not hesitating, just searching for the right words.

"I suppose what you are looking for is either "friendship" or "romance,"" he said slowly.

"Well, yes," admitted the journalist.

"I think it is safe to say that Tamaki had I have been best friends since shortly after we met in our last year in middle school." He looked over at Tamaki for conformation.

"Maybe a month or two after we meet?" he said, remembering the rather violent confrontation that had led to them becoming closer than either of them had ever been to anyone else.

"Something like that," agreed Kyouya.

"So you are friends?" asked Mr. Matsuda, trying to hide his disappointment.

"Yes," said Kyouya.

"Kyouya?" asked Tamaki in confusion.

"However," Kyouya continued firmly. "From that same time I have been in love with Tamaki and we have been together since our junior year in high school, so for about twelve years." He glanced at Tamaki.

"Yeah, that sounds about right," said the blond who trying to hide his glow at hearing Kyouya profess his love so openly and in such a straightforward manner.

"So you are, in fact, lovers?" asked the surprised journalist.

"Yes," said Kyouya.

Tamaki nodded.

"Alright then. You both seem very comfortable about this whole thing. Why is that?"

"Well," said Kyouya. "We agreed in high school to not hide our relationship. Although we didn't parade it around, we also made no effort to hide anything."

"And why did you decide to do that?"

"I think there's great value in honestly."

"What about you, Mr. Suoh?" he asked.

"I agree. Being honest is very important," said Tamaki, trying not to sound awkward.

"So your families are aware of your relationship?"

"Yes," said Kyouya.

"And you two are happy with the arrangement?"

"The arrangement?" repeated Kyouya, raising an eyebrow.

"I meant that there's been no problem with living together, but not allowing the public to know about your relationship?" he clarified.

"As I said, we made no effort to hide anything," said Kyouya.

"And you're happy together?"

"Of course."

Mr. Matsuda paused to think of something else to ask. The couple was not making it easy for him.

"I know I've asked you this already, but you never exactly answered me, so how would you describe your relationship?"

"We're best friends, but we're also lovers," said Kyouya. "I don't think one could ask for anything more in a relationship."

"I think it's perfect," said Tamaki boldly.

"Do you have anything to compare it to, Mr. Suoh?" asked the journalist, jumping on Tamaki's words.

"Well, not really. Nothing of this, um, magnitude," said Tamaki somewhat awkwardly.

"'But you have had a past relationship?"

"Well yeah, but it was very brief in high school before, uh, this."

Seeing the oh-so charming prince type this flustered and lost for words was almost amusing for Kyouya.

"Now, how do you think that the story about your relationship came to be printed today?"

"Someone wrote it and the paper printed it," said Kyouya, shrugging.

"But why do you suppose the story came to light now? Did someone perhaps relieve it to the media?" pressed the journalist.

"I really have no idea. I expected it to come out much sooner than this," said Kyouya. "I suppose that someone finally put two and two together."

"Some people might call this "bad press." Do you think this will damage your career?"

"The only way it which the article was bad press was that it was not entirely accurate. I think if someone does not wish to do business with either of us because of our relationship, that's their lost. In fact, if someone's going to be that prejudice, I don't think I want anything to do with them," Kyouya said. "Additionally, as both of us work for our family companies neither of us is in great danger of losing our jobs. The stories might cause some minor short-term damage, but I do not foresee any long-term injury."

"Do you agree, Mr. Suoh?"

"I can't recall Kyouya ever having been wrong when it comes to business," said Tamaki with a small laugh.

"I'm sure." He consulted his list of questions, which he had written under the assumption that the two men would deny the whole thing. "Forgive me if this is presumptuous, but do you consider yourselves to be gay?"

"We are two men in love," said Kyouya.

"But do you identify as gay? Do you still have any interest in women at all?"

"I will never have any interest in anyone but Tamaki so it's a non-issue," said Kyouya.

"Ditto," said Tamaki, blushing slightly.

The interview continued with nothing of real value being said. Tamaki was clearly getting bored with Kyouya's diplomatic answers and seemed very relieved when it drew to a close. He was still a bit uncomfortable about the whole thing. Finding himself unable to come up with his usual charming turns of phrase was very off-putting and he was glad to have Kyouya and his cool, level-headedness at his side.

"Thank you both so much for your time," said Mr. Matsuda as he stood up and turned off the recorder and put it back in his pocket. "We should be able to get this to press in time for tomorrow's paper and we shall of course send you a copy."

"Thank you," said Kyouya, standing up.

"If you don't mind my asking, off the record, do you always talk like that?" the journalist asked Kyouya.

"Depends on who I'm talking to."

"And is he always so quiet?" he asked glancing over at Tamaki, who was looking out the window at the city street far below them.

"No, definitely not. He never shuts up usually. He's just a little thrown off by all of this. Tamaki," he called.

"Yeah?" asked the blond, jerking out of his reverie.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Oh yeah, sorry."

Kyouya gave a tiny smile.

"Oh I almost forgot!" cried Mr. Matsuda. "Would you two mind doing a brief photo shoot for us? We can do it right here if that's agreeable."

"Of course," said Kyouya.

"Let me get someone from photography over here."

Soon a lovely woman with a camera arrived followed by several over-excited assistants. She assessed the lighting and then began telling her lackeys where to set up lights.

"Alright, if I could have you two on the sofa. Just a natural shoot, not too posed."

Kyouya and Tamaki sat down side-by-side and the photographer inspected the shoot through the camera, telling her assistants to change the light a fraction of an inch here and there.

"You know what? Could you two switch places?"

The two young men obeyed.

"Yes, I think that's much better like that, especially if the picture goes on the left of the article or even above it. Someone make sure layout gets that memo. Right." She peered through the lens for a moment. "Could you do something to look less awkward?" she asked. "Are you supposed to be a couple or not? I saw the article, but I wasn't sure if it was true. The picture needs to tell people if it's true or not. Is it true?"

"Yes," said Kyouya, who was finding the woman vaguely reminiscent of Haruhi in her bluntness.

"Okay then let me see that. Don't go all out and kiss or anything, but show some kind of affection."

Tamaki looked round at Kyouya who raised his eyebrows and gave a little shrug before putting his arm around Tamaki's shoulders. The blond allowed himself to pulled to Kyouya's side so that he was not entirely leaning on him, but his body fit perfectly up against Kyouya's.

The woman looked through the camera again.

"Good, good. I like it. It says "we're in a relationship, but it's nothing new." Is that the angle we're going for?" she asked Mr. Matsuda.

"Yes, pretty much."

"Good, good."

She started taking pictures.

When Kyouya and Tamaki were allowed to go, they were escorted out of the building by the same young man.

As they stood in the elevator again, the young man seemed desperate to say something. He kept making little noises like he was going to speak, but then his voice would fail. Finally, he got the words out.

"Is it true?" he said in a rush.

Kyouya considered the young man with his perfect hair and clothes and his eyes wide with fear and anticipation.

"Yes, it's true," said Kyouya.

"Really?"

"Yes."

"And you told them that?" he asked breathlessly.

"Yes."

"That's got to take guts."

"It's worth it," said Tamaki.

"What do you mean?" the young man asked.

"It just feels really good to be able to say "this is who I love; this is the life I live" and not hide anything." He smiled at the awestruck young man.

"I wish I could do that," he said in small voice.

"Maybe one day you will." Tamaki flashed his brilliant, Host Club smile.

"I- I'm living with- with a guy," stammered the young man.

"What's his name?" asked Tamaki with the interest of a friend.

"Hiro," he muttered.

"Well, I hope that works out for you two."

"Thanks."

The elevator had reach the bottom floor and the doors slide open.

"Don't be afraid of what people think," said Tamaki to the young man. "It took me a long time to finally learn that, even with such a good teacher." He smiled at Kyouya. "But I'm so glad I did because I don't think I'd be able to live if I couldn't be honest about who I love. Not caring about what other people think or say is a hard lesson, but it's the most important one." He gave the young man a gentle smile, took Kyouya's hand, and stepped out of the elevator so glad that the whole world would finally be able to see the shining love he shared with Kyouya. "_Je t'aime_," he said as they walked to the car past the flashing cameras of the paparazzi that had followed them to the newspaper building.

"_Je sais_," Kyouya replied, squeezing Tamaki's hand.

* * *

AN: (Yes, again) Man, that was a long run! Thanks so much to everyone who stuck with it! I really hoped you liked it. I know it got really angsty at points and I didn't get in enough fluff, but whatcha gunna do? I'm not going to lie, I'm really glad to be done with this one and I'll probably never write any fan fic that's quite this long again. (I say that now, but who knows what will happen?) Anyway, thanks again to everyone who read this whole saga and thanks to everyone who reviewed it! You guys are awesome and I hope I didn't let you down with the ending. Long live tamaki/kyouya!

-lux-light-hell-


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